- Graduated from Vassar College followed by Northeastern University School of Law.
- Was deputy director of the Governance and Civil Society Unit of the Ford Foundation from 2001 to 2005.
- Served on the board of the Gill Foundation from 2004 to 2014.
- She was senior fellow at the Social Justice Sexuality Project at the Graduate Center of the City University of New York.
- Up until her death she was president of the Vaid Group, a social innovation firm that works with global and domestic organizations to advance equity, justice, and inclusion.
- Began her career as a staff attorney at the National Prison Project of the American Civil Liberties Union, where she initiated the group's work on HIV and AIDS in prisons.
- In 2012 she launched LPAC, the first lesbian super PAC.
- From 1989 to 1992 she was Executive Director of the National Gay & Lesbian Task Force.
- Was executive director of the Arcus Foundation, a global funder of LGBTQ social justice and great ape conservation, from 2005 to 2010.
- Was an award-winning author and researcher. Her published work includes books, reports, articles, and columns; for several years she was a columnist for The Advocate. She authored the books Irresistible Revolution: Confronting Race, Class and the Assumptions of LGBT Politics (2012), and Virtual Equality: The Mainstreaming of Lesbian and Gay Liberation (1996). She co-edited an anthology with John D'Emilio and William Turner, titled Creating Change: Public Policy, Sexuality and Civil Rights (2000).
- She was co-founder of the Donors of Color Network, the first cross-racial network connecting individuals of color to leverage their giving for racial equity, and of the National LGBTQ Anti-Poverty Action Network, the National LGBT/HIV Criminal Justice Working Group, the Equality Federation and the National Religious Leadership Roundtable.
- She was senior fellow and director of the Engaging Tradition Project at Columbia Law School's Center for Gender and Sexuality Law.
- Life partner of comedian Kate Clinton.
- Aunt of Alok Vaid-Menon.
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