Three Little Beers (1935)

Moe Howard: Moe

Quotes 

• Moe : Press.

  Larry : Press.

  Curly : Pull.

• Desk Relief Clerk : Pardon me, gentlemen.

  Moe : You mean us?

  Desk Relief Clerk : Yes. Are you members of the press?

  Moe : Why, uh...

  Curly : I used to be! But I didn't do any pressing. I went through the pockets, sort of a "dry cleaning"! Nyuk, nyuk, nyuk, nyuk!

• Moe : What do ya know? We're right in the middle of one.

  Larry : The middle of what?

  Moe : A golf place.

  Curly : I don't see any golfs.

  [Moe bonks Curly on the head] 

  Curly : Ooh! Look at the golfs!

• Curly : He's pointin' where you are!

  Moe : Ya mean he's pointin' where I was! C'mon, let's go!

• [Moe is inadvertently cutting divots in the ground while trying to hit his golf ball] 

  Third Gardener : What are you doin'? What are you-? Chop-a, chop-a, chop-a. What are you doing? You gotta a shovel here.

  Moe : Aw, quiet now, will ya? I'm getting better, see? The pieces are getting smaller.

• Golfer : [dodging a ball Larry hits]  Hey, you! Fore!

  Curly : Five!

  Larry : Six.

  Moe : Seven!

  Curly : [grabbing and raising his arm]  Sold to the man with the spittoon haircut.

  Moe : Oh, gettin' personal, eh?

  [he slaps Curly] 

• Moe : What do you know about that?

  Larry : What?

  Moe : A hundred bucks.

  Larry : A hundred bucks?

  Curly : A hundred bucks? Count me in.

  Moe : Second prize, $50, third prize, $25, fourth prize, a keg of beer.

  Curly : What is it? What do we have to do?

  Moe : Shoot golf.

  Curly : Oh, hunting.

  [Moe tries to eye-poke him, but is blocked by a rope hanging between them] 

  Curly : Nyuk, nyuk, nyuk, nyuk, nyuk.

  Moe : [giving him a soft slap on the cheek]  Get out of here.

• Curly : Look, I hit it!

  [his ball rebounds off a tree and hits Moe in the forehead] 

  Curly : What happened?

  Moe : Nothing.

  [as he takes a swing at him, Curly ducks and Moe hits the tassel off his hat] 

  Larry : Look!

  [the tassel rolls into the cup] 

  Larry : It fell in the hole.

  Moe : Just my luck.

• Moe : Pardon me, before you bat that ball. Did you pick up my ball?

  Golfer : Most assuredly not.

  Golfer : [approaching]  Uh, pardon me. Did you pick up my ball?

  Moe : I should say not.

  Larry : [approaching]  Say...

  Moe : Did you pick up the gentleman's ball?

  Larry : Why, no.

  Curly : [Moe turns to him]  Oh, I did not!

  Moe : You "did not" what?

  Curly : I still didn't!

  [Moe bops Curly on the head, causing Curly to woo and run in place, and a plethora of golf balls to fall out of Curly's pockets] 

• Moe : [stuck in wet cement]  Boy, if I could get my hand out of this, I'd crack your head open!

  Curly : Can't get it out?

  Moe : No.

  Curly : Sure?

  Moe : Positive.

  [Curly sticks his tongue out, and Moe promptly slaps him] 

• Moe : Well, Jasper. What did you shoot yesterday?

  Curly : I shot a 7 but they wouldn't give me the money!

  Moe : Hahaha! You did? That's great! Hahaha!

  [slaps Curly] 

  Moe : Come on!