- Hippo: What did I ever do to deserve a couple of yaps like you?
- Stan: Maybe you were good to your mother.
- Hippo: Pipe down!
- Stan: Yes, sir.
- Hippo: Now at 10:00 you're all going over for an IQ test, and according to the answers you give, you'll be classified in a job.
- Stan: Swell! We're good at quizes, aren't we, Ollie?
- Oliver: Maybe they'll put me in the intelligence "corpse".
- Oliver: Brother, you're with him, right now.
- Oliver: I suppose Dr. Schickel's examination isn't good enough. Why, Daniel's allergic to 108 different properties - including candles, cucumbers, and quinces.
- Oliver: You heard what did Dr. Schickel said about pumpernickel?
- Dan Forrester: Yeah, and you heard what the Army doctor said about Schickel?
- Oliver: Thirty-two years in the Army - and not even a corporal? Stan, at last I've met somebody that's dumber than you.
- Ginger Hammond: You looked kinda shy when you came in.
- Dan Forrester: Well, I was sort of surprised to see a girl here. Especially such a pretty one.
- Ginger Hammond: Now you're beginning to sound like a trooper.
- Dan Forrester: Is that good?
- Ginger Hammond: Well, not in the darkroom.
- Ginger Hammond: I can't find your pictures anywhere. Are you in a hurry?
- Hippo: But, maybe, I can help you find them. I've got eyes like an owl.
- Ginger Hammond: Yes, and hands like an octopus.
- Dan Forrester: If I'd known the Army would be this much fun, I'd have enlisted long ago.
- Oliver: It's all in the point of view.
- Hippo: Listen, Sugarfoot, little old Hips has had a tough day - and he sure could use some giggling.
- Ginger Hammond: [looking at a photograph] What's that, a balloon?
- Dan Forrester: No, that's my friend Oliver.
- Dan Forrester: Oh, please, boys. Go back to sleep and let me dream.
- Oliver: All right. But don't overdo it.
- Dan Forrester: I have a date with Ginger.
- Oliver: Daniel, you shouldn't go out with girls. It's dangerous. It might affect your heart.
- Dan Forrester: Oh, it has already. For the first time, it's starting to beat.