Jim Varney: Dr. Otto, Rudd Hardtact, Laughin' Jack, Guy Dandy, Auntie Nelda, Ernest P. Worrell
Photos
Quotes
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Dr. Otto : [the Riddle] When the money is scrambled to the very last cent,riots and hatred soon will commence.When all the world's commerce will be put in a bind,from the evil that lurks where the sun never shines.It is I,Dr.Otto von Schnick -ick-ick-ick,who has played on you this trick-ick-ick-ick. "But who's Dr.Otto?" you may well ponder,while all your magnetic cash is squandered.It's he who had an eye,and yet couldn't see.It's he who served bouillabaisse,when he was a she.It's he who gambled with brains,and a gun.It's he who had all,and yet had none.And to stop this horrible twisted trick,just exchange the poles of old Saint Nick.And if that doesn't do to save the day,put another quarter in and try another play.
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Dr. Otto : [as Auntie Nelda,enters the kitchen] Hurry up sockethead,they're waiting to eat!
Slave Willie : Bouillabaisse cannot be hurried, doctor!
Dr. Otto : [a moan comes from the refrigerator, he shoots it several times] Now, battery breath, now!
Slave Willie : It really does need a few more moments for the ingredients to marinate in their essences.
Dr. Otto : Now all of a sudden I have a Julia Child to deal with.
Slave Willie : But doctor,
[Otto sticks Willie's hand into a blender]
Slave Willie : no,wait,not liquefy,doctor!
[Otto turns blender on, Willie screams]
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Doris : [as Auntie Nelda pours some disgusting looking stew into Doris' bowl] Uh, aren't you having some?
Auntie Nelda : No dear, I'm on a water diet.
Lance : Well, I hope you're taking a vitamin supplement.
Auntie Nelda : I try to take care of myself. My son Hymie, he never took care of himself. He didn't weigh ninety pounds soaked in paving tar.
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Dr. Otto : [as Willie destroys the science projects] Notice if you will, the robot's lifelike movements, his ability to understand spoken tongues, and a vocabulary of nearly 700 words, such as: "ATTACK, WILLIE!", "SEARCH AND DESTROY!", "TORA! TORA! TORA!"
