It's My Party (1996) User Reviews

I just saw this for the first time!

[firesign-2 · 8/10 · 29 April 2006]

I can't believe this movie was made 10 years ago and I never even heard of it before the other day. I was out of town on business, and the hotel I stayed in had Showtime. I fell asleep with the TV on one night, and woke up around 1:30 a.m. This movie was just coming on and it grabbed me immediately. I stayed up and watched the whole thing! I thought it was very well acted and was surprised at the cast of characters. It certainly was a tearjerker, but there were lots of laughs thrown in. I've not seen a lot of movies featuring homosexual relationships, much less ones that were more than a source of a lot of jokes. This one was very touching and I found myself rooting for the characters to work things out.

I would totally recommend this movie for anyone looking to see something a little out of the ordinary.

tear jerker

[kairingler · 8/10 · 12 January 2010]

wow after watching this trust me their will not be a dry eye in the place. a man finds out he has tested positive for AIDS, and he only has so long to live,, he tells his partner,, who doesn't really take it that well, as time passes we see what slowly starts to happen to our main character,, played by Eric Roberts. His lover leaves him in a quarrel, and now we pick up the story a year later, when he learns from the doctor that he only has a few days to live. after that sombering news he decides to have a farewell party for his family and friends, he invites everyone that has touched his life,, and a few people show up uninvited also, which thickens the plot,, including his former lover who tries to make peace with Nick. there are many Hollywood stars in this Bronson Pinchot, Bruce Davison, Olivia Newton John , Roddy Macdowell,, and many many other, too numerous too mention,, this is an engrossing movie and you better have a box of Kleenex handy.. you will need it.

Death with dignity is the issue here, not AIDS or homosexuality.

[Art-22 · 6/10 · 16 January 1999]

This overlong film is not really about AIDS or homosexuality, but about a man who wants death with dignity because he will die in a few days from a brain disease that will first turn him into a vegetable. Although I didn't blame him for his decision to commit suicide, I found it bizarre that he would invite all his friends to a farewell party to say goodbye before he takes his fatal dose of sleeping pills. That should involve only a few close family members, but there were so many characters in this film I had a hard time sorting them out and wondered why some were invited to the party in the first place.

The film focuses on the troubled relationship between the man in question, Eric Roberts, who gives an excellent low-keyed performance as the man in question, and his ex-lover, Gregory Harrison, who kicked him out once Roberts tested HIV positive. There are some moving moments between them as they try to make up. I was also moved by Roberts and his estranged and guilty father, George Segal, trying to resolve their feelings. Acting honors should also go to Devon Gummersall, playing Roberts' upset gay nephew. I very much enjoyed seeing some of the old pros: Lee Grant, Roddy McDowall, Olivia Newton-John, Sally Kellerman and Nina Foch, even though many should have been edited out of the film.

It still reduces me to tears. . .

[bekayess · 15 June 2003]

. . .and even heaving sobs.

When I saw this in 1996 at the theater, I started crying about 15 minutes in and never stopped. I haven't been able to watch it since then. I decided to buy the DVD and see if I coudl get through it without so much crying. ..well, almost.

For me, the emotions start pouring over me when I empathize with all of Nick's loving friends, including his former lover Brandon, who are somewhat supportive of his decision, yet really not ready to let him go quite yet.

As someone else mentioned, the wink that Nick gives Brandon, signalling his forgiveness of Brandon for his selfishness and lack of understanding, just does me in. From that moment on, and up until the end, the tears keep running down my face.

By the way, what a great cast for such a moving film! Eric Roberts and Gregory Harrison are exceptional, and they get great support from Lee Grant, Bronson Pinchot, Margaret Cho, Erich Segal, the late Roddy McDowell, and the rest.

I think I'll watch this DVD whenever I'm feelig cynical and weary of the events taking place in this world of bigotry, hatred and war. At least then I can have a good cry about something that really matters: love and affection from one's nearest and dearest.

An emotional roller coaster even for the toughest man!

[socoluva25 · 10/10 · 14 December 2004]

This movie has to be one of the saddest films ever made. It's right up there along side "Steel Magnolias". I myself cried 30 minutes into the movie. Eric Roberts gives an all out performance as a gay male who decides to end his own life after he realizes he is losing his battle against AIDS. His character decides to have one last big party surrounding himself with family and friends. His ex-lover returns for this one last party to try and make amends. With the constant playing of Dolly Parton's "I Will Always Love You" you watch as this man says his last goodbye's and readies himself for his departure. Even though surrounded by friends and family it gives you a strong sense that in the end we still all die alone. Truly a masterpiece and a must see! Just make sure to keep the tissues close by.

Timely: the 25th Anniversary of the discovery of AIDS. (spoilers)

[vertigo_14 · 7/10 · 9 May 2006]

I borrowed 'It's My Party' from the library this weekend; a coincidentally timely moment to see this film as this weekend marked milestones in the discovery of AIDs, with MSN's homepage having stories this week on both the 25 years of AIDs in America as well as the struggles in Africa with the disease.

This is a particularly sad film (although which one isn't?) about Nick Stark (Eric Roberts), a young West Coast architect who was diagnosed with HIV some time ago and learns from his doctor that he has reached a particularly debilitating stage of the disease known as PML. Not wanting to live life in any sort of semi-conscious state, he decides to commit suicide in a rather dignified way before the stages of disease advance any further. The Party, in the title of this film, refers to the sort of substitution of a funeral for a party, one in which Nick, his friends, and family will gather around to enjoy the last few good times they might have together. He wants no sorrow and no tears and certainly no funeral or wake. This is how he wants to say goodbye.

Nick will be among many of his friends to have died from the disease, although this film relegates the disease solely to that of homosexual men, which I would caution in Hollywood because of the misconceptions that is a disease that only affects gay men. But nonetheless, this is the story of a gay man who has seen many of his friends die to the disease. The particularly sad thing is that you share among the assorted celebration (although not all of it is a particularly joyous occasion obviously because people are aware of Nick's plan to end his life) and in the end, the viewer may be fooled by their Hollywood conditioned expectations that somehow Nick will live in the end and everything will be okay.

This is one film with a particularly familiar and good cast which join together in sort of an awareness project that reminds me of the Laramie Project made some time later. This, at least according to the trivia, is based on actual events that occurred in the early 90s.

Touching and powerful drama

[preppy-3 · 10/10 · 4 January 2004]

Brandon Theis (Gregory Harrison) and Nick Stark (Eric Roberts) have been lovers for years. Then Nick is diagnosed with HIV. Brandon promises to not leave him---but eventually does. He can't handle the HIV. A year later Nick is told he will die very soon of lesions in the brain. Rather than slowly become a vegetable and wither away, Nick decides to commit suicide. He invites all of his friends to a 2 day party--at the end, he'll take the pills and die. Brandon finds out and attends the party. But does Nick want him there and will Nick be able to forgive him before he goes?

Strong, powerful movie. I saw it in a theatre in 1996 and cried my eyes out. I saw it 2 years later with a friend and we BOTH cried our eyes out! Saw it again tonight--cried again. This drama is harrowing at times and brings about questions about love, death with dignity, suicide, HIV...etc etc. But it never gets too maudlin and is always fascinating.

Roberts is just superb as Nick. Strong, handsome, refusing to wither away. He also approaches his HIV condition with strength and humor--as he should. Lee Grant is (sadly) wasted as his mother. Harrison is so-so as his boyfriend. Usually he's sort of stone-faced but there were a few moments that the looks on his face made me break down. There's one scene of him and Roberts just looking at each other across the room--you can see the love, fear and hatred in their faces--it's just great. And Harrison really delivers during the last 30 minutes of the movie.

There's a huge cast in this movie--Margaret Cho (hilarious); Marlee Matlin (wasted); Olivia Newton-John (just great); Bronson Pinchot (overdoing the bitchiness a bit); Bruce Davison; Roddy McDowall. There's the problem--there are too MANY characters! I'm still not sure who McDowell was and Sally Kellerman shows up looking great but--who is she? We're never told. Also, the party scenes are scattershot--the camera seems to linger around catching certain characters and snatches of their conversations. I also have a hard time believing that anyone has this many friends and they all keep quiet about him committing suicide. Still--problems aside this works.

I think this film hit too close for director/writer Randal Kleiser. Supposedly he went through the same things with his lover. When this movie was released he couldn't promote it. It came (and went) very quickly. That's really a shame. It's a strong, powerful movie that should be seen by everybody. And Roberts gives out one of his best performances. The scene when him and Harrison kiss is heart-breaking.

Well worth catching--an excellent drama. Just bring plenty of tissues--you'll need them!

Despite sorrowful theme and genuine poignancy, surprisingly not a downer...

[moonspinner55 · 6/10 · 27 September 2009]

Writer-director Randal Kleiser does fine, fluid work here with this moving hybrid of "The Boys in the Band" and "'Night, Mother". When an upwardly-mobile gay man in Southern California gets a dreaded HIV-positive diagnosis, it helps to end the relationship he had with his lover; one year later, the two men find themselves reunited after the infected one discovers he has lesions on his brain and decides to throw a farewell party for himself before committing suicide. Movies centering on big, noisy parties rarely work, but Kleiser's accuracy in capturing this (not all gay) eclectic group of family and friends shows off a great deal of heart, sentiment, and a small bit of the requisite bitchy humor. A wonderfully odd gathering of celebrities and character-actors pop up in cameo roles, however the leads (Eric Roberts and Gregory Harrison) are the most surprising; with the help of astute editing, they are able to create a rapport that seems heartfelt and real, and Roberts in particular does some of his best work ever. Kleiser wanted this to be a celebration of life, not the mourning of a death, and he pulls it off with aplomb. **1/2 from ****

Blown away by the sentiment...

[rickr-3 · 10/10 · 8 March 1999]

I watched this movie alone one morning on video, expecting it to be a cool ensemble cast movie. It ended up pulling me in so completely that I ignored the phone and never once touched the pause button. It is another of those Hollywood films that may be technically or structurally lacking in the minds of critics...but in my heart and mind it was powerful and effective. By casting known names in many of the subliminal roles...we had a built-in sympathy for them in this situation. The comedy, although sometimes very macabre was believable. I also found the situation believable based on the type of character played by Eric Roberts...the farewell party seemed to fit his personality. I recommend this film to people willing to open their hearts and who don't mind a good cry...

Love story with tragic twist

[Libretio · 5/10 · 21 April 2005]

IT'S MY PARTY

Aspect ratio: 1.85:1

Sound format: DTS

In the last few days before an AIDS-related brain tumor renders him insensible, a young LA designer (Eric Roberts) decides to end his own life, and throws a final joyous bash for family and loved ones. However, the occasion is strained by the arrival of Roberts' former lover (Gregory Harrison), seeking reconciliation at the eleventh hour...

Randal Kleiser's powerful film - inspired by actual events - feels more like a reunion of showbiz friends than a structured narrative, though the results are often deeply moving. Kleiser's defiant screenplay gives short shrift to the suicide debate (Roddy McDowall's character acts as the Voice of Conscience), and he employs mordant humor to keep mawkishness at bay (at one point, Roberts and best friend Bronson Pinchot launch into a rousing rendition of "It's my party / And I'll DIE if I want to"!). As you might expect, however, the final twenty minutes are relentlessly, heartbreakingly sad. Amongst the notable supporting players, look fast for Nina Foch, Sally Kellerman, Greg Louganis, Steve Antin and a virtually unrecognizable Dennis Christopher and Christopher Atkins.

So sad...

[Streetwolf · 10/10 · 16 August 2001]

Please keep your Kleenex close!I think the part where my eyes started getting watery was when Brandon(Gregory Harrison) and Nick (Eric Roberts) kissed. I was yelling and screaming, "Greg!Why?????NOOO!!" Yes I am a big fan of the man and I found it very surprising that he took the part as Brandon. After being lovers for 8 years Brandon and Nick are the complete opposite of each other yet they have so much to teach and learn from each other. When Nick gets tested positive Brandon gets scared and after trying his hardest to cope with Nick's illness he backs away from him in fear...maybe even a slight hatred that he is going to die. So they break up, Brandon finds someone else, who is very young and Nick just pretends he doesn't care. 1 year later Nick finds out he has only a few days to live after he discovers he has a brain tumour. He holds a party gathering friends and family. When Brandon turns up out of the blue everyone hates the idea of him being there, even Nick, but Brandon too needs to say goodbye. The actual part that was the saddest is when Brandon discovers that Nick wants his ashes scattered around they place where they first met, as Nick has now planned to kill himself and basically everyone wants to stop him, but know they can't. This was a terrific movie, there wasn't a dull moment, a lot of flashbacks were shown of the relationship Brandon and Nick shared and I think everyone can relate to that it is never easy to lose someone you love especially to death, but it also shows a side of reality that we all have to go sometime and we might as well make the most of life. Eric was terrific as Nick and the way he was trying to avoid Brandon. Gregory was great as Brandon, the emotions of seeing his loved one die slowly and yet still being strong about it for his sake even sitting by his bedside when he dies I think we all want that, to at least have a person by our side so we don't die alone.

Sticks in the memory like a bad smell

[bob_bear · 1/10 · 29 April 2005]

Appropriately enough, I watched this in Berlin. I say appropriately because "schmaltz" is a German word in origin - but, lets face it, nobody does it quite like our American cousins.

The film sticks in my memory like a bad smell. Sickly and sentimental in the extreme. It turns a genuine health crisis into a third-rate melodrama. Yet another tale of gay doom and gloom. Unrelieved misery and corn on the cob sentimentality. A product of its time. Thank goodness they don't make 'em like this any more.

Unlike other reviews, I don't recommend Kleenex if you choose to watch it, I suggest a sick bag.

A movie for everybody

[natalia44706 · 10 December 2001]

This was a very good tearjerker movie. Everybody in this movie gives an oscar calibre performance. I think that Eric Roberts, Gregory Harrison, and Lee Grant derserved an oscar nomination for this movie. Eric Roberts gives a performance of a lifetime. This is his best movie in his career. I cry everytime I watch this movie. This was better than beaches. This is the movie that deserve alot of oscar nominations.

Excellent and touching

[eric-144 · 9/10 · 6 July 1999]

Excellent and touching drama about a man who has AIDS and finds out he has not that much longer to live, decided to throw a farewell party for himself and invites his family and friends. And also his ex. The results are dramatic, heartbreaking and even a little humour is in here too. The whole cast does an excellent job but a few stand out... Eric Roberts as Nick who is dying of AIDS, Lee Grant as his mother, Maragret Cho as a best friend, Olivia Newton John as a best friend, and Gregory Harrison as Nick's ex. This is an excellent film that I have watched more then once. It will make you laugh and cry. Oh man, will it make you cry!! The score is excellent also as is the direction. Recommended.

The saddest movie ever

[eddax · 10/10 · 15 April 2001]

I'm not a weeper. This is the only movie out of hundreds that I've ever cried watching. It is a simple movie, with many powerful actors giving their most poignant performances. What gets to me most is putting myself in Eric Roberts' place. The image of saying goodbye to everyone I've ever loved before I euthanise myself... ungh... if ever I need to bring tears to my eyes, that would do it.

I should have bought stock in Kleenex

[acidpixie · 10/10 · 1 June 2003]

Not only am I stoked that this is coming out on DVD in 2 days, but whenever I need a good cry, I put this movie on. Dealing with everything from relationships to parents to unfortunately, death, this movie is the best written, directed and casted movies i have seen in a very long time.

PRETENTIOUS!!!!

[gonboy67 · 1/10 · 2 May 2000]

OKAY! So it deals with AIDS which is honorable enough...but this film reminds me of "Drunks," as it really exists as a means for all these "surprise" big names to make cameos in the name of charitable awareness or whatever---self serving, if you ask me! NOBODY has THIS many FAAABULOUS friends and please, gay writers, get over the "Palm Beach Society Matron-Mom" thing: "Roseanne's" have gay sons, too...even if most gay men seem to WISH they were born to C Z Guest. Eric Roberts doesn't look sick enough for his condition, the relationship between the lovers is ill-defined, and just because the theme is honorable, or just TIMELY, doesn't mean the film is FAABULOUS!!

Very difficult to watch. Excellent.

[Heather8470 · 9/10 · 13 January 2011]

Please keep in mind that this is based on actual events...if you rent this, do yourself a favor and re-watch some scenes with the commentary turned ON. This is not "Hollywood" at its best or its worst, as some have said. Hollywood did not invent this story. Some of the drama was added for effect (some of the conflict, for example), but the events were based on the life (end of life) of Harry Stein. It is difficult to watch because of all of the conflicting emotions; the agonizing effort of the characters trying to be uplifting and funny in the face of devastation. It's was difficult for me because I know people in similar situations, so much of it was very realistic to me.

A misleading portrayal, with melodramatic delivery

[A. Miller · 5/10 · 2 November 1999]

As someone who is in remission from PML, I found this film off the mark. Granted, the message is about death and dignity, but it miseducates the viewers in the process. Not everyone dies of PML (I've had it since late 1996), and the people who do certainly aren't capable of having parties if they're within 2 weeks of losing it. This film was a huge obstacle for me when I told people of my illness. Some had seen it, and immediately applied the "knowledge" they'd gained as the context for the disease. This simply was not accurate information, for the most part.

Aside from the portrayals of "fact", I found the acting to be forced, the dialogue melodramatic (at times just plain silly), and the flow of the story to be caught up with too many details and superficial characters who didn't really belong. The only notable performance was Bronson Pinchot, who stole every scene he was in, to the point where he sometimes carried the film on his own.

This film was annoying, overly long, poorly cast and badly acted. No character seemed real, and I couldn't identify with any of them except Pinchot's. The whole affair seemed more reminiscent of the cheesy soap opera Ryan's Hope than a party of friends. If you want a tear-jerking ensemble movie, watch Longtime Companion or Relax It's Just Sex instead.

Great Movie, One of the saddest ones ever!

[nikesis · 20 September 1999]

It's My Party is truly one of the best movies I've ever seen. The two main actors were amazingly believable as gay men and the supporting cast was good too. It will make you understand how important life is and how important friends and family are. If you like sit-down movies, this one is for you. I cried for about 3/4 of it.

My all time favorite movie.

[living_proof · 10/10 · 13 October 2005]

There are few movies that can make me literally sob, not just cry. This movie touched my soul. It is a well written story ingeniously casted. Actors including comedian Margaret Cho, former singing sensation Olivia Newton-John, Eric Roberts, Bronson Pinchot, Marlee Matlin, and others may not be "Top Dogs" in Hollywood, but, deliver compelling, heart felt performances that seem to come naturally to them. It's as if the parts they played were written for them. Perfect casting, good direction, and spectacular performances make "It's My Party" a must see film that you will never forget. Rent it, buy it, or borrow it. Just make sure you have some tissues handy.

Allow yourself to get sucked in...

[dan9241 · 9/10 · 20 April 2000]

Yes, many of my friends hate this movie, because it IS melodramatic and sappy. But the first time I watched it, I got sucked in and cried my eyes out like I had never cried before. I thought it was beautiful.

The performances were realistic and heartbreaking (nearly all of them made me cry at one time or another) and if you feel the need for a good cry, this is definitely your best bet.

Excellent movie

[eric-144 · 9/10 · 27 March 1999]

Excellent movie about a man who discovers he's dying of AIDS and wants to throw a farewell party to his friends and family. Good acting by the whole cast. Good direction and a good score as well. I did not think I would cry but by the end I did cry. Recommended highly

Sentimental Crap

[Aizyk · 1/10 · 27 July 1999]

This film takes itself MUCH too seriously, and to say that it gets carried away by its own self-righteousness would be an understatement. It treats its subject matter lugubriously instead of approaching it in a more dignified way. The result is an agonizingly sappy, pretentious movie that tries to manipulate your emotions but only ends up being annoying instead.

Wonderful film

[Adriane · 9/10 · 8 April 1999]

Great movie that doesn't focus on AIDS and being gay. The performances all around are wonderful, Eric Roberts was especially great because he had a sense of humor about dying. Great movie to watch to reflect on your own life. I cried!