Suddenly Susan (1996–2000)

Andrea Bendewald: Maddy Piper

Quotes 

• Susan : Maddy, we are all here to talk to you about what's been going on lately.

  Maddy : Okay, what's been going on lately?

  Vicki : Don't play dumb with us you lush, we're here about the booze!

• Maddy : Are you aware that we are out of legal sized writing pads? We only have letter sized! I can't work like this!

• Susan : I was over Jack way before he was over me and now he's moving on first? It's wrong, it's just wrong!

  Maddy : I'll tell you what's wrong. Your lips are moving and sounds coming out.

• Maddy : Oh, come on Luis! We live in a universe with certain natural laws. The earth revolves around the sun. Red Sox never win the series and I always reject you!

• Luis : Are you saying that it's my fault that I'm sick?

  Maddy : Well, it certainly isn't mine.

• Susan : It's career day at my old junior high. You're more than welcome to come.

  Maddy : Mmmmm... No thanks, I already have a career.

  Vicki : Yeah... office hag!

  Maddy : Vicki, I could responds to your childish remark by mentioning that your hair would embarrass a troll doll but I'm not going to sink to your level.

  Vicki : Hag!

  Maddy : Freak!

  Vicki : Skank!

  Maddy : Get a hat!

• Todd : Apparently me getting stung by a bee and almost dying isn't newsworthy.

  Maddy : No, but the fact that you're able to read at all certainly is.