Crazy Six (1997 Video) User Reviews

All style; no substance

[refinedsugar · 2/10 · 23 March 2000]

Honestly, I didn't really have high expectations for this movie, but at the same time I was hopeful. Having it be directed by Albert Pyun - a well known b-movie auteur - didn't exactly raise my hopes. I mean how many Albert Pyun flicks rank that highly? Yeah, exactly ... but still the movie advertised a decent cast. Rob Lowe, Burt Reynolds (pre-reborn stardom), Ice-T and Mario Van Peebles.

It all amounts to squat however as the movie is so boring and moves so slowly that the energy just seemed to drain right out of me the longer it went on. It runs over 90 minutes, but it's telling a story that could have been told in 30 minutes flat. I don't know what Pyun was going for here. I mean the movie drips artsy-like style, but it's a blur at times and maybe I'm an idiot for expecting more from Pyun this time around. Here he seemed to actually have a budget and a potentially great cast for the material, but it's all wasted. Crazy Six isn't much of an action film, it's not much of anything really.

I guess what's the saddest here is the fact that I found the end credits the most entertaining part of the movie. The music score is actually half-decent with some smooth female vocals too, but the rest is a complete waste and the less said the better. Avoid.

albert pyun strikes again

[JimFK · 4/10 · 10 September 1998]

directed by albert pyun in his inimitably awful but strangely hypnotic style, "crazy six" is yet another jewel in the crown for this decade's upscale hugo haas (jess franco?). "Stylish" overdirection, incoherent plotting, time-outs in the middle of action sequences for eurodisco torch -song performances, all these seem to be signifying traits for our man Pyun. Most interesting is how he always gets top-notch b-movie casts, compared to Wynorski or some of the other video directors. Ice-T, Rob Lowe, Mario Van Peebles, & the very strange Burt Reynolds ain't a bad cast, though they often look a bit confused. Check out "Postmortem", "Mean Guns", & "Omega Doom" for more top-notch Pyun mayhem!

Somebody please weak me up, this is a total nightmare

[dozer_xs · 2/10 · 21 November 2000]

What is the story what is it on the screen. At first I must say, do not touch this movie, it is for your own best (it sucks). And really what is the story, in the beginning it seems okay but after ten minutes it all gets worse. And that is not all, you can hardly see what it is on the screen it is too dark all the time.

Do not touch.

Boring piece of crap

[saviovega · 1/10 · 29 May 2002]

I bought this movie for about 2,5 dollars at a local flea market. I thought that with the cast present in this movie (Ice-T, Rob Lowe & Mario Van Peebles are all OK), it would be pretty good. Boy, was I wrong. This movie annoyed the hell out of me. Almost every scene drags on too long. The scene where Rob Lowe is watching this girl singing and dancing in a bar lasts forever! It was one of the worst scenes I have ever witnessed in a movie. The rest is no picknick either. My guess is when they finished the movie, they only had 30 minutes of film, so they made everything last 3x longer.

Conclusion: The current 1,9 rating here on imdb is right on the money. This was one of the worst movies I've ever seen. Go watch some paint dry for 1,5 hour instead of watching this!

If you want to see some better movies made by this director, watch 'Mean Guns'(with Christopher Lambert & Ice-T) or 'Postmortem' (with Charlie Sheen) instead.

What on earth?

[jmarcel · 1/10 · 17 July 1999]

Do not rent this movie. I ended up buying the "previously viewed" tape of this for $4.00. That was close to the price of a rental, so thought, I might as well buy it. I'm tossing it out after I finish this review. The movie which stars Lowe, is a music video with few lines of dialogue, slow moving shots and poorly done editing. I thought I'd be seeing a mindless action flick, which is what I wanted to see, I didn't even get that. This movie is an exercise in slow moving shots, no script, close-ups, terrible edited, and a poorly developed plot. I can't believe that is actually ends with a scene in which they think the audience cares about the characters. By the end of the movie, we still don't even really know who they are. Believe the hype, stay away.

laugh out louD!!!

[shimon81 · 1/10 · 7 February 2002]

this is the worst movie ive ever seen. And i have seen lots of movies. Me and my friends rented this one a wendsday evening. Man we had lots of fun. This movie is the worst most boring crap ive ever seen. But it makes you laugh! U will lay on the floor rolling around tryin to get some air. You wonder why? Just rent it and check for the keyboard playing girl at that sleazy russian bar. My mother would make a 1000 times better movie about her feedin the cats.

Yuck!

[Empire-3 · 1/10 · 4 March 2003]

Crazy Six is torture, it must be Albert Pyun´s worst film. Even Blast and Ticker are better! I can´t believe how boring this film is! How this even got greenlighted? I saw this movie about 3 years ago and the only thing I remember is how bad it was. This isn´t good bad movie, it is simply bad, bad, bad, bad, bad movie.

1 out of 10 (½ out of *****)

Don't bother!!

[Islander-4 · 3 October 1998]

As a fan of independent films I expected a lot more out of this movie. The worst part of the movie was the music. For some reason they found it necessary between scenes to return to the same droll song over and over again. The action in this movie was nonexistent, as was the interaction between characters. Mario van Peebles was casted as a French bad guy. This was by far the worst French accent I have ever heard. Rob Lowe was a junkie and played that very well. The rest of the actors weren't noteworthy. All in all, this movie falls into Top 5 bad movies of all time. I've seen B movies (Caged Heat, USA Up All Night, etc.) that had a better plot and acting.

why Burt why???

[slightlymad22 · 1/10 · 6 June 2005]

the worst movie i have ever seen i didn't even watch it all i just fast forwarded it to Burt's bits and then the end!!! he is the only reason to watch this!! i have to admit to owning a copy as i am a HUGE Burt fan (stop laughing) and needed it for my collection i wouldn't care when this movie came out i had a nightmare renting ti as my local store only had 2 copies and fans of all the various stars always beat me there, imagine my disappointment when i sat down and watched this movie!! THERE ARE JUST NO REDEEMING QUALITIES ABOUT THIS MOVIE!!! Absolutely NOTHING WHAT SO EVER TO LIKE ABOUT THIS MOVIE!!! this movie became a running joke between myself and a mate Burt's worst!! Rob Lowe's worst WORST HOUR AND A HALF OF MY LIFE

I have seen a lot of movies, but none of them is even close to being this bad.

[saltkjegs · 1/10 · 5 October 2004]

Yeah, that's right. If I were to ask my friends this question: "What's the worst movie you have ever seen?" They might reply something like "Armageddon" (can you drill the hole?!?), "Shriek", "Plan Nine From Outer Space", "The Medallion", "Scooby Doo" etc... No - Don't get offended by this by thinking you have seen something that might be in the same department of naturally produced human fertilizer that this movie is in. If the worst movie you can think of is, let's say so bad it really pisses you off; then you know nothing my friend.

Crazy Six... I remember the day me and a buddy of mine went to the local video store to rent a movie. Both of us had already been through most of the movies in there, and on the "new movies"-shelf we see it staring at us. "Wow, there's some good actors here man. Says something about mafia, lets just get it and get out of here". This was without doubt the worst movie mistake in my movie loving life. It was also the worst mistake for everybody else: movie lover or not.

Watching this movie is as fun as watching a glass of ice cold water (or ice-tea....) until it reaches room temperature. Watching this movie will make you dream an eternal dream of death, if death is just blackout light and nothing, and then you realize you are just staring at your TV-monitor. Not staring. You are actually paying as much attention that is humanly possible. This is no joke.

This movie is the perfection of making a bad movie. It's not the kind of bad you can watch, point and laugh of, its the kind of movie that is so bad you actually have no chance of ever get out of your memory. Unless perhaps you use electric shock therapy to clear out the brain. .... ... (Hey! That might be something similar to how I remember me and my buddy felt after watching it....)

Best regards from me to you Albert Pyun.

-Joergen

A well-made sci-fi/action movie with a great political depth about the communism fall in the Eastern Europe

[cheese-17 · 10/10 · 23 August 1999]

When I first watched this movie I thought it was a very strange movie. But I know that the director almost always has a purpose when he makes a movie. So I decided to watch it one more time. The second time I watched it I realised that Albert Puyn is a very talented and a very original film maker. In the beginning the viewer was told that the movie took place a decade after the fall of the communism in the eastern Europe. But they had clothes and cars with a design typical for the 1950's. They had plutonium which I think is a symbol for the futuristic trade. I think that it means that the movie's real time is not specified. The music in the movie is creating a long music video which tells some parts of the actual story in the lyrics, specially for the intro and the outro.

Albert Puyn is using red and blue back-color when he's showing the symbols for communism (red) and the capitalism and western world (blue). One can notice that Ice-T, has the name Mao (communism) and that when he's in focus the back-color is red. The american cop, starring Burt Reynolds, is always filmed with blue back-color. The club where Mao and his gang hang out is also with red back-color. Crazy six is pendling between the red and the blue color.

The white little dog that Mao had in the beginning symbolize, I think, the controlling force. Mao had the dog in the beginning but the cop took it in the end. That symbolize, I guess, the fall of communism and the replacement of the capitalistic way of thinking from the western world in Eastern Europe.

I think Crazy Six is a very well-made movie. Albert Puyn creates an sci-fi/action movie with a politicial depth. It's a different but a very special movie about the communism fall in the Eastern Europe.

I'm looking forward to watch another spectacular movie of Albert Puyn.

it's not quite that bad...

[Zargo · 6/10 · 20 July 2002]

Granted, it's no Mean Guns, but it doesn't quite deserve to have a rating under 2. It had a fair few dull scenes, but the last half hour is pretty good. It's true that the credits are the best part though, but that's because the music's so good, much too good for this movie.

When Bad Movies Happen To Good People!

[MIDDLEMYATT · 1/10 · 12 June 2005]

I'm actually too drained to write this review -- bad movies always do that to me -- but I feel obligated, as if it's my civic duty, to warn anyone who might be considering purchasing or viewing this god-awful mess-of-a-picture. Please, please, just take my word: this is one you'll want to stay away from. It's so boring and dull, so insipid and uninspired, such a poor excuse to assemble any familiar talent. Burt Reynolds? Wasted (despite his best efforts). Ice-T is barely in the film, and when he does appear on screen his performance is so restrained and muted that it becomes crystal clear that the director, perhaps intimidated by Ice's intense stare, didn't know what to do with him. Rob Lowe, as the title character, has never displayed so little on-screen charisma. Mario Van Peebles should be ashamed of himself; his performance is, in the saddest sense possible, a joke. Surely, Satan himself signed Mario's check for this film. The plot is as weak, half-baked and annoying as all the music involved (the utterly boring club song seems to continue on, literally, for the first third of the movie). The film's look will prompt one to seriously wonder if the Director of Photography was also forced, like one of the film's forgettable female characters, to smoke crack from a pipe duct-taped to his mouth. And if you're looking, at least, for stylized, shoot-'em-up-type violence you'll get none here. This film, I assure you, I promise you, has Absolutely no redeeming qualities! Please, I implore you, Avoid this Flick! Don't put it in and get suckered into believing that its pace will pick up, it'll get better, and evolve into a decent denouement. It won't. It don't. It can't! It sucks! Now, you have been warned, and I can now go to bed (It's 3am - please forgive any resulting errors this admonition might contain) -- knowing my conscience is clear, because I've done my civic duty for my fellow man!

Action that's difficult to swallow..and watch!

[trent-9 · 17 December 1998]

They say that since communism died, Russia hasn't been the same. Of course everyone knows their economy has suffered, but less is known about the insurgence of crime that has taken over that country, especially from the new mobs.

Crazy Six is a low level mob leader. His real name is Billy (Rob Lowe) and he's also a chronic drug addict. When he and his boys decide to rip off a rival operation led by Raul (played by Ice-T) he finds that he's in for a real gang war. Billy teams up with another rival mob boss named Dirty Mao (Mario Van Pebbles) in order to overthrow the power that Raul has.

Billy's girlfriend, played by an unknown Russian actress named Ivana Milicevic, has tried to overcome her drug addiction and become a one woman lounge act, suddenly is an unwilling participant in the war between the two groups. She wants to start a new life with her 5 year old daughter, but her involvement with Billy means trouble, not only with the other gangs, but in possibly falling back to the activities that got her in trouble in the first place.

Along for the ride is Burt Reynolds as a local law enforcement agent (I don't make these things up) who seems to come in whenever he's needed. His is the most vague character, and with the cowboy look fits into the picture the least.

Crazy Six leaves so many questions that you really don't know where to start. First, why is the film even set in Russia? There's so little indication, other than a few instances where someone says something in Russian, that the story takes place there that it seems a bit arbitrary to give it a specific location. It could have been in South Central Los Angeles, or the ghettos of New York. Second, who are these people? They are in Russia, yet hardly any of the cast is Russian. Rob Lowe? Ice-T? Burt Reynolds? Even Mario Van Pebbles uses a French accent. It's been said that Russia was the new land of opportunity...for crime, but did everyone outside of Russia see it that way and head over? The story is so vague and slow that you simply have to guess as to the motives of each character.

The film is so vague as to the motives of each character that it's impossible to really see the point. Lowe walks around in a drugged stupor the entire film, and Van Pebbles accent is so rediculous as to be laughable. Everyone in this film, with the possible exception of Ivana Milicevic, is miscast. She is Russian and, therefore, believable. The others don't pull it off, and keep us wondering why they are there.

Burt Reynolds is lethal and implacable in this thrilling action film!

[ary · 5/10 · 8 January 1999]

I never understood the reason why all the criticism about Crazy Six consider it an insupportable trash.If you take a few seconds off your time to read my opinion,and then go check with the others,you will realize that all of them destroyed the film,warning that it is not a worthful of watching,and that you should not even rent it!the same users who said that about this middle-budget movie,starring Burt Reynolds,literaly applaud rubbishes,millionaire films wich bombards the public with special effects,mega stars who don't know even how to act(for instance,Schwarzenneger,Stallone and Bruce Willis,tasteless and horrible men who think are actors!who said that those guys can act?!),incredible visual effects,but that are not more than trash because those movies don't even respect the public's intelligence!at the same time people pay to watch those films that allowds Stallone and his good ol'fellas to receive twenty million dollars per film,the real legends,the real great actors are relegated to the ostracism,like Burt Reynolds(who finally came back in Boogie Nights) and Tom Selleck. Don't judge and make your own conclusions about Crazy Six before watching it!rent this film,and you will realize that it is an interesting thriller,with memorable interpretations of their main actors,mostly for Burt Reynolds acting.Director Albert Pyun is original,he has an own style of conducting action scenes,and if there is a reason for which the others hated this movie,it's because it allows an original style,it's creative and different,and because Crazy Six is the opposite of the big studios rubbishes,all of them tediousness,boring and horrible,all of them packed in luxurious box.And Burt Reynolds,playing the implacable cop,offers an excellent,thrilling interpretation,his charming presence in Crazy Six helps to elevate it to a higher landing-place.After Boogie Nights,the faith will certainlly reserve to Burt a lot of protagonist roles in big studios action films,but this time,in opposite off trashes like Armageddon and Con Air,Burt Reynolds makes all the difference!let Stringer,The Progenitor and Deliverance 2 come!!!

Please, don't waste your money!

[Jemmy · 1/10 · 19 December 1998]

I am not afraid of bad movies. I like bad movies. I enjoy mocking them in the company of my friends. We're all quite good at it, in fact. That being said, let me tell you how much I hated this movie.

To begin with, it was incomprehensible. Rob Lowe attacks some people, they capture him but he escapes in this big ol' shoot out. There's this singer whom we think died, only she didn't, unless maybe there are several of them who all act and look the same. Cue Burt Reynolds to come in and question the singer. He looks like he's just wandered into this movie off of the Walker, Texas Ranger set and is darn confused. Then Rob Lowe dies, only he doesn't... And the worst thing is, there's not enough dialogue or action that doesn't involve killing people or attempting to to even make fun of this movie!! And don't even get me started on the random chihuahua. Then there was the fact that it was supposed to be about the old power structure in Eastern-Europe falling apart. We didn't know where we were, all the accents were apparently "Eastern-European" and what were Burt Reynolds and Rob Lowe doing there in the first place?

I desperately wanted to tell the people at Blockbuster what I thought of this movie, and to get my money back, but since I'd gotten it as a special (only $.99) I decided against it. What I want to know, however, is HOW THE DIRECTOR GOT THE GREENLIGHT to make this darn movie, and what the 'stars' were thinking when they signed on???

2 hours of my life wasted for eternity...

[bek-12 · 1/10 · 21 September 1999]

This movie was a monument to inept filmmaking on a colossal scale. I'm a huge Burt Reynolds fan, but even he was horrible in this film. The only redeeming quality of this film was the chick that smoked all the time. She was kind of attractive to look at. Otherwise, what a waste of time and energy...

Just Not Very Good

[nickman1091 · 4/10 · 22 July 2001]

It's been said that some directors make small budget pictures look like blockbusters. Albert Pyun makes small budget pictures look like high school A/V project films. This film was pretty much lacking in all departments. Practically every scene drags on excessively, the "experimental" lighting and camera work is terrible, Rob Lowe apparently equated being scruffy with acting, and the poor drab Euro-pop numbers stop the movie to a dead halt. On the plus side, Burt Reynolds does a pretty good job with what he's given (which isn't much), Mario Van Peebles is surprisingly decent and Ice-T puts in another of a long recent string of B-movie gangsters. Not Pyun's worst work (Urban Menace), but certainly not his best (Mean Guns).

Finally, Speed 2 has competition for the worst movie I've seen in the last five years.

[Rascal-9 · 2/10 · 5 November 1998]

I was suckered in by the big names. Rob Lowe, Mario Van Peebles, Burt Reynolds, and the fact that it was an independent film. Unbelievably slow beginning: 35 minutes, two dreary songs and a botched rip off. I didn't care about the characters, and the plot never tempted me to even pretend it could be realistic. I can't believe this is what makes it to the screen. I loved watching this film because it felt so good when it was over.

A terrible non-starter

[Leofwine_draca · 3/10 · 18 March 2019]

CRAZY SIX is another terrible non-starter of a movie from director Albert Pyun, shot in Slovakia with an all-star cast who are entirely wasted in nothing roles. The story is about rival gangsters struggling for domination and the various characters who intertwine with them. Rob Lowe is the nominal hero, an anti-social drug addict unrecognisable behind a 'tache and long hair; supporting him is Ice-T, an extended cameo from Burt Reynolds, and Mario Van Peebles. There's even a smaller role for RETURN OF THE LIVING DEAD's Thom Matthews, but the whole thing is so bad that this is a complete waste of time.

Worst film in decades!!!

[alpha-12 · 1/10 · 18 August 1999]

Do yourself a favor and stay away from this film. Minus 50 billion out of 10. If you want hard boiled action don`t rent it! If you want a good independent film look elsewhere!

I never thought i`d see Burt Reynolds in such a crappy movie. It has the thinnest plot-line ever. Van Damm flicks should win an Academy compared to this one.

Rob Lowe once again prove why he is not the hottest actor in the world. Even Hasselhoff would have made a better drug addict than him. I do not want to bore you with more facts about this crappy movie, except to say that you are better off renting anything by Hulk Hogan or Dolph Lundgreen. This should prove my point, if you get my drift.

Great b-movie with plenty of cool actors...

[Alex-2 · 10/10 · 31 December 1998]

Albert Pyun delivers a very good action/drama about a junkie who tries to rip-off a big crime-lord. A lot of style and many very cool actors. Burt Reynold is excellent.

Above average "Jim" movie.

[Culli · 6/10 · 10 September 1998]

I think Rob Lowe actually pulled this one off. Ivana was better. Burt should have a few more lines and needs to work on the "old cop" routine. He almost had it.

What a goddamn load of c¤#%

[Smift · 1/10 · 2 February 2003]

I saw this movie a time ago, because some of my friends wanted to rent it, and I got voted down.. I tried as best I could to get the story, because some moviemag had said that this would be a movie that would be for Rob Lowe, that Pulp Fiction had been for John Travolta... Well.. we can all see that he not only failed, but he fell aaall the way down. This is actually the worst film I've ever seen, and I've seen a great deal of bad movies.. it's just not even worth seeing for free on tv.