Dilbert (1999–2000)

Kathy Griffin: Alice

Quotes 

• Wally : Wow. I never knew that little people could be so sexy

  Alice : That's disgusting. I can sue you both for making this a hostile work environment

  Dilbert : Ten minutes ago you beat a man senseless.

  Alice : He was senseless before I beat him.

• Alice : I think I speak for all women capable of reproduction when I say... no.

• Alice : Man, she must've blown some smoke up your butt. Did she use a giant fan or just some kind of hose?

• Dilbert : Must one person's triumph be another's humiliation?

  Alice : Of course.

• Alice : I want you to make Asok my assistant.

  Catbert : If I made Asok your assistant, it would destroy his tiny ego.

  Alice : So you'll do it?

  Catbert : I need more than that. Help me help you.

  Alice : All right, let's see... it would breed resentment through the entire employee population?

  Catbert : Uh-huh... nice... you make a strong case...

  Alice : Are you thinking?

  Catbert : No, I'm toying with you. Alright, I'll do it... on one condition.

  Alice : Name it.

  Catbert : I have to be there to hear him scream when you tell him.

  Alice : Deal!