Mrs. Allison is the owner of the Saltare Swimsuit company. Her top man Brian, and his not so bright assitant Willard have to find men and women that can be prospective models for her ... See full summary »
Maximillian is the only survivor from a race of vampires on a Caribbean Island, and as a vampire, he must find a mate to keep the line from ending. He knows that a child had been born to a ... See full summary »
At a museum of Mexico City arrives a perfectly conservated mumie. It is a vampire who has died years ago and who returns to life in search of his lost love Angelique. But unfortunately for ... See full summary »
Out at Pacific Coast University, five students living in the same apartment building go through personal trials. Stacey was a famous volleyball player and fashion model once; now she's in ... See full summary »
After a military plane crash near a small American town, a giant man-eating snake set off on a killing spree. The locals must find a way to eliminate the snake with the help of a scientist who knows about the snake and terminates it.
Casper Van Dien
Count Dracula is in L.A., running a hideous club scene, and he's angry that a rogue vampire, posing as a streetwalker, is slashing. He's also unhappy that Dallas, a youthful undead and former protégé, is in town. The rogue slasher, Nico, serendipitously picks Dallas as a victim; after discovering each other's nature, they become lovers. In fear of the Count, Dallas's coterie urges him to kill Nico, but he refuses. Meanwhile, a Viennese vampire hunter, Van Helsing, arrives in L.A. and hires the Crips to help him. They're soon following Nico and Dallas. When they capture her, Dallas wants to deal: spare Nico and he'll lead the hunters to Dracula. It's time for stake and bake. Written by
Modern Vampires is a darkly comic social satire, not a straight-ahead vampire movie. Due to the way film was marketed, some unsuspecting viewers, thinking they were going to see a straight-ahead vampire film, may not have gotten what they expected. See more »
When they pull up in front of the club to celebrate Dallas's return to LA, the license plate on the car is for Florida. See more »
I never knew vampires could do sex.
That's a myth. With a good commercial lubricant we could go for hours.
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Only in America can vampires expect to call for garbage pickup. No messy disposal problems here. As a vampire author, I'd far rather see vampire movies that feature something new, rather than rehashing the old myths - no matter how well it's done. (For a similar new take on vampires, though hardly as funny, be sure to see Dance of the Damned) Actually, though Modern Vampires seems to strive to be intentionally bad, this makes it very funny, very hip though certainly not for everyone.
I loved it for the early humor (The scene with the bitchy salesperson in the dress shop was worth the rental price all by itself), and was sad to see the over the top end did not work quite as well as the first half.
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