Simon Birch (1998)
Ian Michael Smith: Simon Birch
Photos
Quotes
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Simon : What I want to do and what I do are two separate things. If we all went around doing what we wanted all the time, there'd be chaos.
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Simon : Boobs!
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Simon : You're already a bastard. Might as well be an enlightened one.
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Rev. Russell : What are you doing sitting in a corner Simon?
Simon : Thinking about God.
Rev. Russell : In a corner?
Simon : Faith is not in a floor plan.
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Simon : I don't see how pork chops could lead to intercourse, no matter how good they are.
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Simon Birch : Sex makes people crazy.
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Simon : If God's made the church bake sale a priority, we're in a lot of trouble.
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Simon : It's the *Virgin* Mary, Eddie. What does Joseph have to do with anything?
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Simon : I said, what does coffee and donuts have to do with God?
Rev. Russell : They're merely refreshments so people can socialize and talk about up coming events.
Simon : Who ever said church needs a continental breakfast?
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Simon : Ahh! It's a horse!
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Simon : I don't think God's plan includes breaking and entering.
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Simon : I look like a burn victim.
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Simon Birch : I'm sorry! I'm sorry!
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Simon : Now get over there with the other flying monkeys, where you belong.
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Simon Birch : Thank you Miss Wenteworth.
Rebecca Wenteworth : You know what Simon? Thank you.