Bad Money (1999)

Tamsin Kelsey: Eileen Baines

Quotes 

• Eileen Baines : Funerals are such a solemn time. You can make them a more..."up" experience by distributing cookie dough, wrapped in dark parchment to your mourners

  Murray : All Finished, Mrs Baines

  Eileen Baines : Murray did you know that cookie dough is one of the best ways of saying "welcome to my home"? And the dark parchment, well, that speaks for itself. If you can't find dark parchment at your local supplier, you can always use some black string, and well if you can't find that, you can use a black shoelace. Just make sure it's not nylon.

• Eileen Baines : I know, I know, I know you think I'm a middle class zombie. But at least I'm a middle class zombie with style.

  Twin Baines Sons : Does this mean we're not going to computer camp?

  Sylvia : It's not that I think you're a zombie, mom. It's just that cookie dough, it's so... eating disorder.

• Sylvia : Mother, Dad is dead. He's not comming back.

  Eileen Baines : Well, then he's not comming back, in an elegant fashion.