Girl in Gold Boots (1968) User Reviews

Oh, my god

[Smells_Like_Cheese · 1/10 · 12 December 2003]

Before there was "Showgirls" there was "Girl in Gold Boots". This film is even worse and worse made. You know, I really think the director took himself seriously when he made this movie. Sad, is it not? But I think he didn't realize that he had a budget to stick to when making this movie.

The plot? Michele is a wanna be dancer (who really can't dance, but we're lead to believe she's the best) but is unfortunately kept with her alcoholic father in the popular restaurant "Eat". But when a Kasey Kasim wanna be walks in with promises to make her a professional dancer with the help from his sister who is the "main attraction" in L.A., she leaves within the blink of an eye. On their way they pick up a hitchhiker, Critter. Of course there will be tension since everyone loves Michele's looks.

When they finally arrive in L.A., and there is Christmas decorations all around Hollywood, where's a better place to go than a haunted house? But it's just a hidden dance joint where the dancers look like they're more having seizures and clucking like a chicken then dancing. Michele, Buz, and Critter get involved deeper than they would want in the business with a slick greasy pusher who owns the joint. When Buz's sister, Joanie, is obviously in bad shape from drugs and possibly overdosing on the fake eyelashes, she confesses that she once had a "pretty mind" and tells Michele to get out before Leo, the pusher, takes her down too. But can Critter and Michele make it alive when they already know too much about a plot and a murder that doesn't make much sense?

Oh, man. You have no idea how poorly made this film was made, I mean we're talking just God-awful acting, poor sound, bad editing, atroshish writing, and a horrific picture. I just loved how in one scene, it's just Critter and Michele are sitting ALONE at a table, but in the blink of an eye Buz is in the picture. I loved MSTK3's commentary "I'm back! Come on! I just teleported here! It's impressive!". Watch the MSTK3 episode, that's the only way you'll enjoy the film.

1/10 for the film 10/10 for MSTK3's version

You dance like a clown...

[Dextrousleftie · 1/10 · 20 April 2009]

I absolutely love this movie, I don't know why. It's terrible in all of its parts. I've seen epileptics who have better dance moves than the title character and the girl Michelle. The songs are mediocre at best, the continuity and editing are both terrible, almost everybody in the film is oily looking and/or ugly, and there is no plot to speak of whatsoever. That said, for some reason despite these things(or maybe because of them), this movie is hilarious. The MST3K version is a delight, although something tells me that I'd still laugh a lot just watching it uncut. Michelle is not only the most untalented dancer that I've ever seen, she is dumber than a bag of hammers. 'Critter' is blandly good looking and not very talented at his chosen craft either. Buzz is a horrible little greaseball, and yet Michelle shacks up with him because he promises her that he can help her become a dancer with the aid of his drugged out sister(who also is a completely untalented dancer). But then, considering her disgusting drunker father, who she was still living and working with even though she had to be in her mid-twenties at least - Michelle does not have good taste in men or the brains to know when its a bad idea to shack up with a guy who carries a gun and pistol whips people with it at the drop of a hat. They all get mixed up with an oily drug dealer, and Buzz ends up killing a guy over heroin. He just gets better and better! The immensely lame 'plot' sort of trails off, as Critter goes off to fight in Vietnam after pummeling Buzz and Leo half to death. This after many, many horrible scenes of Michelle and/or Buzz's sister dancing. Stupid, completely stupid. But somehow, delightfully so. Makes me laugh every time I watch it.

"You dance like a clown!"

[Sandcooler · 3/10 · 10 April 2015]

Joy Division's Ian Curtis would often cause chaos at his concerts, because his dancing style closely resembled an epileptic seizure: bystanders would call 911 just to be on the safe side. I've never known how Curtis developed such a bizarre style, but I'm fairly certain he owned a copy of "Girl In Gold Boots". I also can't fathom why a woman that a) clearly can't dance, b) clearly can't act and c) isn't married to someone powerful would get cast as the lead of a musical, but one thing's for certain: this is about a dozen times as entertaining as a competent musical. The movie was produced and directed by prolific Z-grade horror/sci-fi legend Ted V. Mikels, who seems out of his comfort zone when he can't use zombies, evil witches or crazed serial killers who feed victims to cats. The movie doesn't have any plot, it just drags itself from one strange dance scene to another. But that's fine by me. Seeing our lead and her marginally less untalented co-star dance like they're on stilts never stops being entertaining. If anything, this movie should have more awkward dancing rather than less. Very palatable, for all the wrong reasons of course.

Thank God For MST3K

[rmssw · 16 February 2002]

If it weren't for that brilliant show, no one would have ever seen this movie after the 60's...not that that's a bad thing.

This movie is a big, steaming pile of continuity errors and bad acting. There was a vague plot buried beneath all of this, however it was as thin as paper and made transparent by the grease dripping off of the actors.

There are countless errors and inexplicable scenes in throughout this movie. Who could forget Buz magically teleporting into the booth at the diner? Who could forget the utterly mind-boggling dune buggy scene? It seems as though this movie was made for MST3K, and, I warn you all, should not be viewed under any circumstances without the hilarious one-liners of Mike and the robots.

The bane of dancing films everywhere

[NateW · 1/10 · 28 June 1999]

When it comes to bad movies,this movie is bad. Not quite 'Hobgoblins' or 'Space Mutiny' bad, but bad enough. As for boring, this ranks up there with 'Blood Waters of Dr. Z.' and if you're an MST3K fan like me, you know how bad that is.

Now on to the movie. Well, if you mix together a bad plot, an overplayed dance number, lame acting, a cheesy script, drugs, and greasy non-threatening villains, you've pretty much have this movie. Oh my, and the sorry excuse for an editing job! This is the most poorly edited movie I've ever seen, next to 'Future War', another great MST3K episode. In one scene the mousy villain appears out of nowhere next to the 'heroes'. It's THAT BAD!

Movies are supposed to entertain and tell a coherent story line. This one fails horribly at both. Watch it only on MST3K! Anyone who enjoys it any other way is SICK!!!!!

Golden Boots I'm A Gonna Wear, Cuz They Look So Neat

[bkoganbing · 1/10 · 21 November 2008]

If Offbeat Cinema hasn't grabbed Girl In Gold Boots for one of their late evenings roasts than they are not doing their job in finding some of the worst cinema put on celluloid. This must have been a great second feature in the drive-ins in 1968 when people were getting down to something else.

On That Seventies Show one of the funniest lines I ever heard was from pretty and vapid Mila Kunis who said that nothing was ever going to get in the way of her ambition to becoming a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader. That same sense of purpose exists with our leading lady Leslie McRae who dreams of going out to Los Angeles and becoming a go-go dancer. It certainly beat slinging hash in that New Mexico diner with her drunken father. When Tom Pace comes into her life saying he's going to LA where his sister does just that, McRae hears enough and jumps in the car with him. Along the way they pickup another wandering stranger Jody Daniels and the three of them are off to Tinseltown after Pace robs a filling station.

They find Pace's sister, a drugged out dancer working for club owner Mark Herron who's got his fingers in a lot enterprises, mostly illegal. Pace doesn't really care about his sister, he just sees opportunity for himself and McRae gets hired as a new dancer and Daniels becomes a club janitor. Herron indicates that Daniels could do better for himself with him and you can take that any number of ways.

The film is one sorry mess, lousy sound recording, inane plot, totally bogus climax to this piece of drama. If you recognize the name of Mark Herron it will be because you remember who was Judy Garland's fourth husband. Mark wasn't doing that great before he married Judy, and when she cut him loose this was the best his meager talent could get.

Oh and the music is bad Sixties music and the acting on the level of some of my grade school plays. When will Offbeat Cinema be showing Girl In Gold Boots?

Wow-One of the worst films of the 1960s

[eichelbergersports · 1/10 · 15 June 2006]

Film, a Ted Mikels Production, "stars" Jody Daniel as "Critter," a long-winded draft-dodger (sort of like Bill Clinton), who teams up with a slutty dullard of a waitress, Michelle (Leslie McRae), and dime store thug, Buz (Tom Page), on a trek to an L.A. strip club, The Haunted House. "The Incredible Journey" this ain't.

Opening title song, performed by Chris Howard & The Third World, is as inane as "Never Steal Anything Wet" by Mary Wells (which opened "Catalina Caper") and "Ha-So Stratosphere Boogie" by Jimmy Bryant & His Night Jumpers (which introduced "Skydivers") and, to make things worse, they play it about 10 times throughout the movie!

Other songs, including "Wheels Of Love," "Everything I Touch," "For You," "Do You Want To Laugh Or Cry," "Hello Michelle," "One Good Time, One Place," "Lonesome Man," "Cowboy Santa," and "Strange Things," make this one of the worst musical soundtracks since "Incredibly Strange Creatures......," "Newsies," "Grease 2," and the remake of "Lost Horizon."

Buz, the poor man's Regis Philbin (who, himself, is the poor man's Joey Bishop) first meets Michelle gyrating awkwardly to a jukebox in a run-down greasy spoon, and claims she should dance professionally, even though she has no talent, whatsoever. And, since his sister, Joan (Bara Byrnes) is the "number one attraction in Los Angeles," she decides to leave her abusive, drunken father and go with him.

Along the way, they meet up a couple of wimp bikers, pick up the hitch-hiking "Critter," frolic with a guy in his goofy beach buggy, and rob a mom and pop store. Of course, the two guys get into a fight over Michelle, who, with her huge face, stringy hair and caked-on eye make-up, is slightly less feminine than Harvey Firestein in "Torch Song Trilogy." And her acting makes one yearn for the professionalism of ANY of the women in "Pin Down Girls," "Charlie's Angel's: Full Throttle."

They finally arrive at the club, which, evidently, actually existed (complete with a huge mouth for a stage with nostrils that randomly spews steam for some reason) in a time when good taste and a pleasant atmosphere obviously were not very important to patrons. Once there, Michelle, despite her aforementioned lack of talent, rhythm, looks, brains, coordination, athleticism, or charisma, is hired immediately, and soon vaults passed the pill-popping Joan, while Critter and Buz get rewarding positions as a janitor and a drug pusher, respectively.

The club's owner, Leo McCabe (Mark Herron), comes from the Carlo Lombardi-Great Vorelli sleaze school, with a henchman (Marty-William Bagdad) that looks like Ortega's (from "Incredibly Strange Creatures") cousin.

And, in the tradition of past washed-up pop stars who've appeared in B-movies (see Little Richard, the Cascades, Platters, Mel Torme, and Paul Anka, among others), Preston Epps, who had a #14 hit with "Bongo Rock" in 1959, makes an embarrassing cameo during the party scene.

In that particular sequence, Michelle's complete lack of dancing skills are never more evident as she drunkenly sways about the room in most humiliating fashion. Later, as tough and athletic as Buz is supposed to be, he's easily chased down by a pudgy, middle-aged, bald jail trustee (Harry Blatz played by Harry Lovejoy), who looks like a cross between Victor Buono and Dabney Coleman.

Anyway, to make a long review even longer, Buz, in a fit of stupidity, kills Harry, but he, Leo and Marty are subdued by the pacifist Critter, who, seeing the error in his peace-loving ways and joins the Army, just in time to be shipped of to Indo-China.

A profoundly bad counterculture movie that makes itself worse by actual selling out in the end. for all his rebellious talk and swagger, Critter thinks it's best to and fight for Uncle Sam.

I weep for the soul.

"Showgirls" on ACID!!!.....

[EuroNYC7 · 1/10 · 4 December 2005]

When I first watched this piece of junk, it was in the company of my MST3K buddies, Mike and his irrepressible funny robots Crow and Tom Serbo...thank goodness for such an occasion, because frankly there is no way in hell I would have seen it "MST3K-free"!! For a moment, I could've sworn the Buzz character was Regis Philbin in his early acting career before "Regis and Kathy Lee" hit the spotlight well over a decade later (hey, got to start somewhere!)... until the credits later rolled and discovered it was a total unknown by the name of Tom Pace (WHO???) Some bubble-headed coffee-shop gal takes up on an offer to ride with the RP look-alike, picking up a simpleton loser named Critter in the process, and heading for possibly the biggest Red Light District L.A. has to offer...just so she can be a dancer! God, what a waste of film! Throw in some real bad acting, atrocious editing (The U.S.S. Enterprise had to be orbiting Earth that day because the way Buzz suddenly "beams" into the screen in the restaurant booth...), the sleaziest, oil-enhanced night club owners ever seen, not to mention a senseless dune buggy shot, an unheard-of prison system program with thugs walking in and out of a jail at will, lousy songs and the Beach Boy-wannabes that perform them, and finally a dialog that can only compete with that of a '70s porno flick, and you've got yourself two choices: Watch it on its original version in which case you will senselessly throw away two hours of your lifetime...or watch the MST3K Version, and get yourself a bucketful of laughs. The guys from the Satellite of Love will brand it their hysterical form of justice.

Bad, but not so bad as they say.

[dalton2 · 3/10 · 17 April 2002]

Listen to this: I have bought this movie on DVD. I saw this film on the third bottom position on the IMDb, and I thought: OK, I have to buy this trash and judge it by myself. I saw the original DVD at Amazon.com, and I just bought it.

My conclusions after watching this film 4 consecutive times is:

1) It's bad (this is not new, I guess).

2) There are lots of worse films, so this film shouldn't be at the bottom 100, of course. Take a look at Cantando a la vida (1968), for example. It's at least as bad as TGIGB.

3) The 'huge' continuity error in which one guy is supposed to be teleported into the scene simply doesn't appear. There is one scene where he comes along and sits with a beer in his hand, so there is no continuity error at all. In fact, I haven't seen many continuity errors in the whole movie. Please tell me where they are, to look closer at them.

4) The music isn't so bad. Compare it with Manos' soundtrack, for example (Yes, I have bought the Manos DVD, too). I even like the main theme, it has a nice rythm, and the girls aren't Michael Jackson, but in any case you must think that this is a film made in the late sixties. People didn't dance like today. Take a look at Travolta in Saturday Night Fever. Do you think that's dancing...? It's like saying that the Beatles didn't have any appeal because they didn't use synthesizers or electronic drums.

5) I have read in one of the comments that this film should be dedicated to the other girl, who really wears the gold boots. Well, I disagree. The title refers to the boots themselves. The girl who wears them is the main dancer. The rest of them wear silver boots. And, indeed, the EAT waitress finally puts the gold boots on towards the end of the film.

6) The fact that a film is shown in MST3k isn't a reason by itself to consider that film a pile of trash. I'm sure that many of the people who have written comments at the IMDb about TGITGB even haven't watched it, at least without Joel & the Bots.

7) I have no relation at all with this movie :-) It's just that I think it's not so bad as people say. I would have liked it to be much worse, so I wouldn't have spent my money on a DVD containing a film which isn't good nor absolutely horrible, either.

8) My rating: 3-4 out of 10.

Mikels troupe

[HSauer · 4/10 · 11 July 1999]

For anyone who can't get enough of the romantic leads in this films (Leslie McCrae and Tom Pace): check out Mikels' 1972 b-movie classic "Blood Orgy of the She Devils," also starring Les and Tom! Both look a little "hipper" in the latter film.

Why is this #32?

[planktonrules · 3/10 · 4 March 2009]

IMDb has a "bottom 100" films--those with the lowest ratings of the many thousands of films listed on the web site. The bottom 100 films list is pretty wretched, though many truly horrible films somehow missed inclusion on the list. And, oddly GIRL IN GOLD BOOTS did make the list--even though it's not that bad a film at all, especially for Ted V. Mikels. Mikels has made some amazingly bad films (such as CORPSE GRINDERS and ASTRO-ZOMBIES) but compared to these films, GIRL IN GOLD BOOTS is practically Shakespeare! Yet, of the three films I mentioned, inexplicably GIRL has the lowest IMDb rating. I think this is due to this film being featured on "Mystery Science Theater"--and I've noticed that many films shown on this show have LOTS of reviews and ratings because of the notoriety it gave them.

The film is about three people who are heading to Los Angeles. One is a pretty lady whose life goal is to become a go-go dancer (she dreams big, huh?!). One is a punk guy who is thug through and through--he is the most poorly written and acted of the three--by far. And the last is a soulful guy who is cute, plays the guitar and sings. While these characters are all very one-dimensional, they are interesting and hard to ignore because the script and their roles are so tacky! When they get to L.A., they get jobs with a seedy nightclub owner. This jerk also deals drugs and has a twitchy and greasy sidekick who looks a bit like Dracula and a mortician morphed into one. The punk joins them in a "trio of terror", the lady realizes her dream job (only to realize it isn't that dreamy after all to be a go-go girl--who'd have figured?!) and the nice guy hangs around to keep an eye on the girl and to keep her out of trouble.

The film is cheaply made and jam-packed full of silly 60s song and dance numbers and pop culture references. Lots and lots of silly go-go dancers fill the screen in the second half of the film and often it just looks like padding, but at least the girls are rather pretty and the script is semi-competent. The nice guy also inexplicably sings a couple numbers like Frankie Avalon and he was probably the only guy in the film who seemed to have much talent. But, being connected with Mikels and this film surely didn't help him very much in the long run. In fact, of all the main characters in the film, NONE OF THEM had a single credit other than this film!! Apparently this film was a kiss of death to their careers and they all eventually became go-go dancers!

While the dialog is occasionally lame and the film isn't great, it is an interesting kitschy time capsule. Plus, for an ultra-low-budget film, it's pretty good and watchable. While compared to all films I might score it a 3, for a low budget "quickie" it is quite competent despite the Mikels touch!

Overrated

[makeham98 · 10/10 · 5 July 2002]

This movie is overrated by the MST3K crowd.

You can't go wrong with go-go dancing.

You can't go wrong with gold boots.

Was this the inspiration for Showgirls?

So Bad So Awesome!

[southfljb · 6/10 · 6 June 2017]

This has to be one of the best MST3K movies ever! Since discovering it we have watched it numerous times and never get tired of making fun of it.

The acting is so bad its good and the editing and continuity errors are some of the worst (and funniest) you will ever see. The music is actually pretty good and the go go dancers are great.

The lead "actors" are amazingly bad and had pretty short and limited careers but that is what makes this film so good. Many of the on the road scenes look like the same road used in "Duel" and many other low budget movies and TV shows. The footage of 1968 Hollywood is great, seeing all the long lost venues that no longer exist.

Its worth a viewing with friends for a good laugh.

THE GIRL had gold boots, the rest silver...

[Aaron1375 · 2/10 · 12 April 2001]

This is a film that I watched for the first time on Mystery Science Theater 3000 which is not surprising as this is not something I would even try to watch without them. Usually, when I did see a movie they riffed before I saw it on their show it was a horror film or science fiction one. All the biker ones and Ed Wood ones I usually saw on that show first. This is probably due to the fact that I can watch a bad or horrible horror film, but anything else to me is just hard to stomach if it is bad. This film was pretty bad as it does not really have much to it to begin with. Starts out as a traveling type film where a group of people are on the road and trying to get to California. Then the film becomes the precursor to Showgirls. Okay, that is not fair at all...to this film! The plot is all over the place, the person they seem to frame as the hero is not and a guy who you think is going to be inconsequential ends up being the most important character. Of course, one does get to see lots of attractive girls dancing during one stretch of the film.

The story is a bit all over the place as we start out with a girl who works at a place called, Eat with her alcoholic dad. A guy named Buz comes in and changes her life forever as he means to rob the place, but never gets around to it and soon he and Michele soon are headed for California where Buz's sister is a dancer for a nightclub and he thinks Michele can be a good dancer too! He also wants to do the nasty with her and he thinks that she has lots of money. They soon team up with a guy named Critter and get him to join their group as well because Buz mistakenly thinks he is loaded too and soon the are becoming fast friends and on their way to California right after Buz has to rob a gas station to finally get enough money to get there. They end up at a nightclub called the Haunted House where the band plays the same song over and over and girls flop around on stage and Michele can easily do this so she is soon replacing Buz's sister as the main attraction, but what does Buz care as he is too busy setting up a crime that involves breaking into a prison and somehow getting out. Meanwhile, Critter just wants to get Michele out of there!

This made for a very funny episode of MST3K, but I do think there had to be a lot left on the floor with this one. Just too many jump cuts to random scenes like the guy with the dune buggy and the scene where Buz randomly pops up at the table where Michele and Critter are having a conversation. The film's run time also says there is a cut of the film that runs 102 minutes so maybe the missing footage would explain just how Buz got out of that prison and other questions. Or maybe, the missing sections featured topless dancers which would have been even better than finding out how he got out of prison! Still, not going to track down an uncut copy of the film to find out as I kind of doubt it features lots of nudity.

So a bad film, yes! Not sure it was as bad as it looked featured on MST3K as it was cut a good deal for the show. It may even be worth a couple of more points on the score card if there were some hot scenes. Then again, if the scenes involved Buz or Leo it might have gotten deducted a few points too! Even with the edits, the film still plays out like two films as it does start out more focused on Buz, Michele and Critter's journey to California and then kind of slams on the breaks as they make their way to the Haunted House where only the dancing girls makes the film watchable. Still, gotta love the name of that restaurant...Eat!

Not that bad, seriously

[bellino-angelo2014 · 28 August 2019]

Girl in Gold Boots was on IMDB's infamous Bottom 100 list (the list of the 100 lowest rated movies) until the number required for votes increased, it's directed by Ted Mikels (considered by many one of the worst filmmakers ever) and to this day it has an appalling score of 2,2. But probably I am not the typical viewer, since for me it was an ok movie and hence my score of 4.

The movie is about three youngsters that are going to Los Angeles. The title character is a girl that works in a bar and hopes to become a nightclub dancer, his boyfriend is a thug-looking guy that at times he is on a short fuse, and the third one is a cute guy that likes to sing and play guitar. When they finally get there they discover that is not like they hoped (the girl discovers that being a go-go dancer is not that great a job after all and the cute guy hangs around while he keeps an eye on the duo).

Despite it's a B-movie it's well made compared to many others of the time. It has decent cinematography, nice soundtrack with various good tunes of the time, during the credits and halfway in the movie various shoots of pretty girls dancing. Also, and this is the thing I liked most of the movie, the cute guy halfway sings a couple ballads just like Elvis Presley and he was the most endearing character of the trio. Sadly, since this movie was made by Ted Mikels (that already in 1968 had the reputation of being one of the worst directors ever), it automatically killed the actors' careers.

While at times the movie drags, it's watchable. And despite is made by Ted Mikels is competently made and it's an interesting time capsule as well.

The pain, the pain

[warlorde · 1/10 · 9 August 2003]

Truly an awful movie with cornball acting, and the characters so, what's the word I'm looking for,,,,standard. Don't make any excuses for this movie, Mike and the bots were right on in lambasting it. I guess stripper movies are just fair game to rip ala Showgirls, Striptease, and most porno flicks.

1 out of 10 for the movie, 8 out of 10 for the mst3k version. "Oh I use to have such a pretty mind!"

Slightly better than Hobgoblins

[tquindt · 2/10 · 18 April 1999]

This movie was slightly better than Hobgoblins. MST3K gave it the treatment it deserved.

Pretty Terrible In Its Lack Of Plot

[gavin6942 · 3/10 · 24 June 2013]

A waitress (Leslie McRay) tries to become the top star in the glamorous world of go-go dancing.

What makes this film so bad is not its sound or picture or characters, but its complete failure to accept a coherent plot. The first part of the film is a bit like a "buddy road trip" picture, with a girl escaping her drunken father and a dune buggy ride sequence... and then it switches gears to a film about robbery and drug dealing.

With some editing, this might not be too terrible of a movie. First and foremost, the scenes of the dancing need to be trimmed. They are too long and too frequent, testing the viewer's patience for hearing the same song repeatedly with awful dancing to match.

Like everyone else on here, I saw this movie thanks to "Mystery Science Theater". But I would not put it in the Bottom 100. With a little work, it could be a manageable picture.

Full body dry heave set to 'music'(spoiler land)

[MissLeFey · 1/10 · 5 January 2004]

Mike and the bots were right... The lead character, Michele (Leslie McRae who, to me anyway, kinda looks like Angelina Jolie), is an aspiring go-go dancer. She doesn't do much dancing so much as she twitches and "dance like a clown". Michele really does make Elaine Benes on Seinfeld look worthy of Broadway. She heads to LA with Buzz and Critter (I'll get to them next) to make her dreams come true. Buzz's greasy crackhead sister, Joanie, is supposedly the #1 dancer in LA. Riiight. Joanie, with the help of some oily club owners gets Michele a spot.

Then you have Buzz and Critter. Sad excuses for character. Both try to be 'hard core' and for some reason the movie characters keep referring to Buzz (Tom Pace) as a 'young man'! He's like, eighty! Our Fair Critter (Jodi Daniels) speaks flowery language that sounds like Shakespeare after a severe stroke. Buzz is a drug pusher who carries around a gun (uncommon in those days) and pours beer on motorcycle seats and talks to a guy who looks like "Arafat in the 60's". Critter is a draft dodger who apparently changes his mind somewhere between the greasy fight with the doppelganger club owners and the end when he and Michele get married. To quote Tom Servo "He decided he likes violence and is ready to fight like a manotta!" Avoid this movie unless filtered by MST 3K.

Watch first half; discard the other half!

[Miz_Behavin24 · 4/10 · 25 June 2006]

This movie I first saw via the MST3000 series, and have to admit, it's not the worst movie they ever have spoofed. However, I agree with the person who wrote about the movie being a combined story/plot. It starts out a bit fuzzy.....Buz's foiled attempts at robbing "Eat" were not clear to me until I'd seen the movie a few times.....and I wasn't sure exactly where the Critter guy fit in. After a few scenes, it started to piece itself together, and for a 1969 movie, wasn't all that bad......until the movie became less focused on Michele's dream to become a dancer, and more focused on Buz's drug-dealing. That's where the film splits in two. I was content with the first half, but bored to tears in the second. Of course, MST3000 certainly helped plod it along, and I probably wouldn't have watched the movie otherwise, but none-the-less.....I would say the movie had several different writers who couldn't agree on one story-line!

There was a moment in the film where I actually kind of liked it...

[lemon_magic · 3/10 · 8 April 2005]

Ted V. Mikels: Your guarantee of inept movie making. But FWIW, I thought this was probably the best film I ever saw with Mikel's name on it, in that it didn't make me want to throw myself into the woodchipper...compared to something like "The Corpse Grinders", this film comes off as pretty well.

But this is in no way, shape, or form a GOOD movie. The characters are cardboard cutouts, the actors are mostly unattractive and charisma-free, the script is your standard 60's 'rebel without a cause' fare, and the whole film looks like it was shot on a budget of about $30.

However, there is a moment in the film, when the band is playing the OTHER dance number that ISN'T the title track, sort of a Byrds/Burrito Brothers thing with a nice driving bass line and some plangent minor vocal notes and the dancers are choogling along (including our heroine in her first 'real' on stage dance)...it's a nice moment. In the words of Mike Nelson (in another of context), it's a moment where I actually don't want to drive a fire axe through the chests of everyone involved. So the movie has that going for it.

On the other hand...the putative 'star' dancer, who we first see leading other dancers...she has to be seen to be believed. I would really like to know what the choreographer and the director were snorting or smoking when they came up with the spastic flailings they captured on film and presented as 'dance'. Even without the MST3K coverage, the pure kitsch/comedy value of this train wreck of a dancer is worth the price of the movie. (BTW, the backup dancers are usually OK...nice bodies in bikinis, and they jump and shake the way that only very young women can.) That's emblematic of the entire movie...not so much bad, as incompetent and entertaining only by accident.

Not worth seeking out, but maybe worth a quick skim through on a lazy Saturday afternoon.

Fool's "Gold"....

[Mister-6 · 1/10 · 2 December 2000]

Ted V. Mikels - the undisputed master of trashy movies about trashy people doing trashy things in trashy places. And "Girl in Gold Boots" has his trashy fingerprints all over it.

The plot - if you must. Waitress runs off with unstable, grinning grease-ball to break into the dance club circuit and picks up a draft-dodging loser along the way. They all make it to LA and watch in horror as drug-dealing, murder and go-go dancing make their lives a totally un-groovy experience.

I don't ask a lot from movies like this - only that they reach the lowest common denominator in the most entertaining way possible. This one didn't, and that's the most charitable way to put it.

Big hair, folk music, foot-long eyelashes, greasy bad guys with greasier mustaches and bright red stage blood are the call of the day (or, of 1969) and, if I noticed, there are a few "Gold Boots" in here.

Or, at least boots that looked kind of gold - somewhere, anyway...I mean, there has to be, doesn't there? Doesn't there? I mean, that's the name of the movie, ISN'T IT?! HUH??!! Ohhhhh, I wish I had my pretty mind back...

At least I had MST3K to help me through it. Thanks, Mike. Thanks, robots.

One star for "Girl in Gold Boots", eight stars for the MST3K version.

Just one problem, though - if the name of the restaurant was "EAT", what did they call their bathroom? Hmmm....

Do not nitpick

[bmalakwa · 8/10 · 1 September 2021]

Do not nitpick the bad acting, the minor continuity problems, the silly songs, the sleazy actors, the robotic dancing, this is an entertainment gem. It has a plot and fist fights that you would see in any Elvis Presley or John Wayne movie.

One of the best MST 3000 episodes

[robertmurray-70637 · 6/10 · 24 August 2019]

Yes, it's a bad movie but it's a great Mystery Science Theater 3000 episode. I love the dance numbers. Yes, the lead actress can't dance but the other dancers can. Check out the blonde in the back row on the left. Wow. I even like the band. It's every 1960s high school garage band before they graduated and went to college ... or Vietnam.

Quite possibly the worst movie ever made

[TheMediocreGatsby · 1/10 · 13 September 2002]

This movie is so horrible, it's amazing that it was ever made. When, in the middle of a scene, a character just teleports into the middle of the screen for no reason, your jaw hangs open in astonishment that you're watching such a terrible film. The only time this movie is worth watching is when featured on MST3K, and then it's hilarious. Other than that, avoid this movie at all costs, and you'll be a lot better for it.