Ice Age (2002)

Denis Leary: Diego

Photos 

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Quotes 

• Sid : For a second there, I actually thought you were gonna eat me.

  Diego : I don't eat junk food.

• Sid : [about the baby]  I bet he's hungry.

  Manny : How 'bout some milk?

  Sid : Ooh, I'd love some!

  Diego : Not you. The baby.

  Sid : Well, I ain't exactly lactating right now, pal.

  Diego : You're a little low on the food chain to be mouthing off, aren't you...

  Manny : [in a shout that echoes]  ENOUGH!

• Diego : Whoo, yeah! Who's up for round two?

  [pause; embarrassed] 

  Diego : Um, t-t-tell the kid to be more careful.

• Dodo : Prepare for the Ice Age.

  Sid : Ice Age?

  Diego : I've heard of these crackpots.

• Diego : The baby? Please. I was just returning it to its herd.

  Sid : Oh, yeah. Nice try, Bucktooth.

  Diego : You calling me a liar?

  Sid : I didn't say that.

  Diego : You were thinking it.

  Sid : [whispering, to Manny]  I don't like this cat. He reads minds.

• Diego : "Us"? You two are a bit of an odd couple.

  Manfred : There is no "us"!

  Diego : I see. Couldn't have one of your own, so you decided to adopt.

• Diego : I've eaten things that didn't complain this much.

• Sid : My feet are sweating.

  Diego : Do we need a news flash every time your body does something?

  Manfred : He's doing it for attention, just ignore him.

• Diego : Is its nose dry?

  Sid : That means there's something wrong with it.

  Diego : Someone should lick it, just in case.

• Manfred : Hey, buddy, want a lift?

  Diego : No, thanks. I'm saving what little dignity I've got left.

  Sid : You're hanging out with us now, pal. Dignity has nothing to do with it.

• Diego : [playing peek-a-boo]  Where's the baby?... There he is!

  [the baby's only reaction is blinking; it is so startled it's quieted] 

  Diego : Where's the baby?... there he is!

  Manny : [the baby begins crying again]  Stop it, you're scaring him!

• Sid : [after Diego snuffs out the fire on his tail]  Thank you. From now on, I'm gonna call you "Diego..."

  Diego : Lord of Touch Me and You're Dead.

• Diego : Save your breath, Sid. You know humans can't talk.

• [Sid is drawing a sloth with chalk] 

  Diego : What are you doing?

  Sid : I'm putting sloths on the map.

  Manfred : Why don't you make him more realistic and draw him lying down?

  Diego : And make him rounder.

  [Manfred draws a pot-belly on Sid's drawing] 

  Diego : Perfect.

  Sid : Ha, ha. I forgot how to laugh.

• Sid : [catching up to Manfred and Diego, he sits down on the top of a geyser]  Hey, thanks for waiting.

  Diego , Manfred : Three, two, one...

  [the geyser erupts, and sends Sid shooting up into the sky] 

  Manfred : Sure is faithful.

  [Sid lands with his head in the geyser] 

• [last lines] 

  Sid : You know? This whole ice age thing is getting old. You know what I could go for? A global warming.

  Diego : Keep dreaming.

  Sid : No really...

• Manfred : Here's your little bundle of joy. We're returning it to the humans.

  Sid : Awww, the big bad tigey-wigey gets left behind. Poor Tigey-Wigey.

  Manfred : Sid, Tigey-Wigey's gonna lead the way.

  Sid : Uh, Manny, can I-can I-can I talk to you for a second?

  Manfred : [passing]  No. The sooner we get to Glacier Pass, the sooner I get rid of Mr. Stinky Droolface. And the baby, too.

  Diego : You won't always have Jumbo around to protect you. And when that day comes, I suggest you watch your back... 'cause I'll be chewing on it.

  Manfred : Hey, über-tracker. Up front where I can see you.

  Sid : ...Help me.

• Diego : Why did you do that? You could've died trying to save me.

  Manfred : That's what you do in a herd: you look out for each other.

  Diego : Well... thanks.

• Manny : AAAH.

  Diego : AAAH.

  Sid : AAAH.

  Roshan : WHEE.

• Diego : Maybe we shouldn't do this.

  Sid : Why not?

  Diego : ...Because if we save him he'll grow up to be a hunter. And who do you think he'll hunt?

  Sid : Maybe because we saved him, he won't hunt us.

  Diego : Yeah, and maybe he'll grow fur, and a long, skinny neck and call you Mama.

• Soto : Just you look at the cute little baby, Diego. Isn't it nice that he'll be joining us for breakfast?

  Diego : It wouldn't be breakfast without him.

  Soto : Especially after his daddy wiped out half our pack. And wears our skin to keep warm. An eye for an eye, don't you think?

  Diego : We'll teach that human what happens when he messes with sabers.

  Soto : Alert the troops. We attack at dawn. And Diego: bring me the baby, alive. If I'm going to enjoy my revenge, I want it to be fresh.

• Soto : What are you doing?

  Diego : Leave the mammoth alone.

  Soto : Fine. I'll take you down first.

• Sid : [showing the baby cave paintings]  Look, the tigers are just playing tag with the antelope...

  [pause] 

  Sid : With their teeth.

  Diego : Come on Sid, let's play tag. You're it.

• Diego : I'm... sorry I set you guys up.

  Sid : Ah, you know me, I'm too lazy to hold a grudge.

• Manfred : Sid, the tiger found a shortcut.

  [Sid looks up at the mountain they will have to climb] 

  Sid : No thanks, I choose life.

  Diego : [glaring at him where he stands so Sid almost runs into him when turning]  Then I suggest you take the shortcut.

  Sid : Are you threatening me?

  Diego : [in a shout that echoes]  *MOVE*, SLOTH!

• Diego : You want to maul something, don't you, Zeke?

  Zeke : [whining anxiously]  I wanna maul.

  Diego : Then what are you waiting for?

• Diego : At the bottom of Half Peak... there's an ambush, waiting for you.

  Sid : What?

  Manfred : What do you mean ambush?

  [Beat] 

  Manfred : You set us up.

  Diego : It was my job. I was supposed to get the baby, but then...

  Manfred : You brought us home - for dinner!

  Sid : That's it. You're out of the herd!

• Diego : Hello, ladies.

  Oscar : Hey, look who finally decided to show up.

  Soto : Diego. I was beginning to worry about you.

  Diego : No need to worry. In about two minutes you'll be satisfying your taste for revenge.

  Soto : Very nice.

• [Morning arrives, Manny wakes up and feels for the baby in his trunk, only to discover that the Baby is gone. He stomps over to the sleeping Diego who wakes up with a start] 

  Manny : WHERE'S THE BABY?

  Diego : You lost it?

  [They look at each and notice Sid is not there] 

  Manny , Diego : [shouts]  SID!

  [Scene shows Sid with the baby in a jacuzzi like mud hot spring; using the baby as a 'chick magnet' to attract two female sloths] 

  Rachel : Oh, he's lovely. Positively adorable!

  Jennifer : [baby-talking to the baby]  Hello Pumpkin. Hello, little bunny baby...

  Rachel : [to Sid]  Where did you find it?

  Sid : Ah, poor kid was all alone in the wild. Sabers were cornering him, So I just snatched it!

  Rachel : Oh, so brave of you!

  Sid : Yeah, well... He needed me...

  [wistfully] 

  Sid : And I wished I had one of my own, too...

  Jennifer : [excited]  REALLY?

  [she calms herself down] 

  Jennifer : I'm... I'm attracted that quality in a male.

  Sid : [unaware that the baby is sinking into the mud hot spring]  Who wouldn't be?

  Rachel : [gushing]  You caring for a baby...

  Sid : [notices that Roshan the baby is gone and pulls the muddy baby up]  Yeah, well... You know...

  [the baby playfully throws mud on Sid's face; they both laugh] 

  Sid : [as he grabs something to wipe the mud off his face]  Cute kid, huh? So, as I was saying ladies... uh...

  [wipes the 'something' on his face, which is Manny's trunk; he realizes and gasps] 

  Sid : Oh, hey! Hey... Manny!

  Manny : [taking the giggling baby away]  What's the matter with you?

• Diego : You don't know much about tracking, do you?

  Sid : Hey, I'm a sloth. I see a tree, eat a leaf, that's my tracking.

• [Manfred just grabbed the baby] 

  Diego : Um, that pink thing is mine.

• [Rumbling is heard] 

  Manfred : [to Diego]  Tell me that was your stomach.

  Diego : Shh.

  Sid : I'm sure it's just thunder. From, under... ground?

• Diego : [examining the ground]  You didn't miss them by much. It's still green, they headed north two hours ago.

  Sid : [mimicking with sticks in his mouth]  It's still green, they headed north two hours ago.

• Diego : Well, I've a message for Soto. Tell him, I'm bringing the baby. And tell him I'm bringing... a mammoth.

  Zeke : A *mammoth*?

  Lenny : Mammoths never travel alone.

  Diego : Well, this one does. And I'm leading him to Half Peak.

• Diego : [after riding the ice slide chasing after Moeritherium]  Wow! Hoo! Yeah! Who's up for round 2?

• Diego : Name's Diego, friend.

  Manny : Manfred. And I'm not your friend.

  Diego : [condescendingly]  Fine... Manfred.

• Diego : I'm working here, you waste of fur.