Greg the Bunny (2002–2004)

Victor Yerrid: Tardy Turtle, Cranky, Crippled Writer, Mr. Hygiene

Photos 

Quotes 

• [Eating paintballs] 

  Tardy : The green ones make me horny!

• Tardy : Crayons taste like purple!

• [Tardy Turtle takes a TV Guide reporter on a backstage tour] 

  Tardy : That's Junction Jack's dressing room, that's the wall, and that's...

  [looks at a mirror and shrieks] 

  Tardy : That's... a turtle!

• Gil : I need you to be quiet, Tardy!

  Tardy : Okay, Gil. I am singing the Quiet Song, the Quiet Song, the Quiet Song...

• Warren : Hey Tardy... listen, I need to fill some seats tonight, how'd you like to come to my play?

  Tardy : I like to play with Warren.

  Warren : No, Tardy. I will be IN a play. You understand?... performing.

  Tardy : I'm not supposed to eat the Legos.

  Warren : [mutters]  Eauh, God! It's like talking to Keanu Reeves.

• [talking about supporting Greg The Bunny's interest in the Pupish Movement] 

  Jimmy : Hey, why don't you guys give him a break? Instead of stabbing him in the back, why don't you try showing him a little support in the front? Lets face it, humans have been mistreating puppets for centuries. It's nothing new. We lure them to our country with the tartar sauce, and the lollipops, and the empty promises of sparklers which I believe are yet unfulfilled. Tardy, you got your sparklers?

  Tardy : I'm tough but nice.

  Jimmy : Yea that's what I thought! And then we go and trade their hides for, you know, cheap whiskey during the war of the roses.

  Dottie : Is that true?

  Count Blah : No

  Jimmy : We had them build our airplanes and our suspension bridges and our jet packs and our race cars, but can you name me one puppet that's ever taken home the trophy at the Minneapolis 500? I dare ya. Can ya? No!

  Alison Kaiser : I understood the pupish better.

• Tardy : I made a smelly in my shelly!

• Tardy : I finished my sandwich, I'm 'upposed to get pudding!

  Tardy : [disappointed]  ... I hid my sandwich.

• Gil : Tardy, how do you feel about Alison?

  Tardy : I love Alison!

  Alison Kaiser : Tardy, how do you feel about ashtrays?

  Tardy : ...I love ashtrays!

• Tardy : [Tardy Turtle drives by in a fork lift]  I'm not supposed to do this!