Club Dread (2004)

Brittany Daniel: Jenny

Photos 

Quotes 

• Putman : [with disdain]  What kind of a man has sex with a goat?

  Juan : Hey, I used a condom.

  Jenny : [who had had sex with Juan]  You told me they were against your religion.

  Juan : Ehh, you know, I need to find Peen-a-lope. I am sure you all understand.

• Jenny : [as Lars and Putman are preparing to go into the woods]  Aren't you bringing any weapons?

  Lars : [confidently]  I have all the weapons I need.

  Putman : Piss on that! I'm bringing a mah-sheh-tay!

  [machete] 

• Hank : When you're all done with your little pink panty meltdown, let me know... 'cause I'd like to get down to business.

  Coconut Pete : I thought it was time to bring in the pro.

  Sam, The Fun Police : Hank?

  Coconut Pete : Yes, Hank. The head of security on all my tours.

  Jenny : So, what? He keeps aging hippies from stealing the bong out of your tour bus?

  Coconut Pete : It just so happens that Hank used to be a federal agent. Yes, that's right. Headed an FBI task force on serial killers. Single-handedly caught the Minneapolis Mangler.

  Lars : Who's the Minneapolis Mangler?

  Hank : Exactly!

  Dave : Pete, you are aware that I've personally served this guy 20 beers a day for the last 10 years, right?

  Hank : [shows a nasty scar on his stomach]  Hey, I was in Nicaragua, junior! When you can stuff your intestines back in your pockets and walk 20 klicks to an aid station after a knife fight with guerrilla drug lords, then you talk to me!

• Jenny : [Re: Coconut Pete's song "Naughty Cal"]  Our lives depend on us interpreting the dumbest fucking song I've ever heard!

• Juan : [Juan, Penelope, Lars and Jenny are about to dive off a very high cliff]  When you jump, squeeze your ass-cheeks together, or water will fly up your butt-hole and pulverize your intestines.

  Jenny : [after the dive]  Oh, my asshole!

• Lars : I guess now they'll kick me out of the Pacifists Club.

  Jenny : Or just ask you nicely to leave.

• Putman : David, you hated him for killing your parents. You see, what none of us did know, what none of us could know, was that David's parents were trampled to death at a Coconut Pete concert.

  Jenny : What the hell's wrong with you Putman? Everyone knows Dave's parents got killed at a Pete show.

  Juan : Yeah, way to bring up a sore subject.

• Sam : [referring to lyrics from a Coconut Pete song]  You know, octopus spelled backwards is supotco. Juan, isn't that Spanish for something?

  Juan : Supotco? No. But, the word for shoe is zapato.

  Sam : Hmm, shoe.

  Putman : [returning from being on stage]  What'd I miss?

  Jenny : Apparently somebody's going to get killed with a shoe.

• Lars : [walks up behind Jenny, who is drinking some booze, and does a Tai-Chi move on her back]  Hey, Jenny.

  Jenny : [by sheer reflex, her mouth opens, and the drink in her mouth slobbers down her front]  Oh!

  Lars : Sorry.

  Jenny : Give me a heads-up before you do that.

  Lars : It's just a habit. I could see how tight you were from a mile away.

  [Lars starts to drink] 

  Jenny : What can I say? Some girls are just tighter than others.

  Lars : [by sheer reflex at what she said, he accidentally sprays out his mouthful of booze in her face]  Sorry.

• Jenny : [Dirk and Jenny are in the pool at night; Dirk sneaks up behind Jenny and scares her]  You asshole!

  Dirk : No, I'm not an asshole. I'm just young, dumb and full...

  [pretends to be scared] 

  Dirk : What the fuck? Something just brushed up against my leg!

  Jenny : [shocked]  Oh, my God! What is it?

  Dirk : Seriously, there's something down here!

  Jenny : [frightened]  What?

  Dirk : [laughs]  Oh, no, wait. It's just my gigantic cock.

• Lars : So, I guess I'm talking to a celebrity. Congratulations. I heard you got your own fitness show?

  Jenny : [sad]  Uh, yeah. Amy Aerobics accidentally ate some rat poison. It was awful.

  [enthusiastic] 

  Jenny : But I'm still really psyched!

• Jenny : [about Penelope]  Who is she?

  Juan : She's my girlfriend.

• Juan : [to Jenny, hiding in the closet]  Eh, I'm still not sure. I may need a few more hours to "pump" her for information.

  Jenny : [mad, whispering]  You asshole! Now you're just trying to get laid. How would you like to be stuffed in this closet while I go out there and have sex?

  Juan : That is a great idea.

  [toilet flushes] 

  Juan : Shh! Here she comes!

• Sam : Alright, Lars will probably come after us here.

  Jenny : We don't know for sure that it is Lars. We don't know if he got out, or if someone else got in.

  Sam : [accusing tone of voice]  What is it with you and Lars? I'm beginning to wonder if you two aren't in cahoots! I mean, let's see. You had sex with Rolo, and he's dead. You and Cliff, right? He's dead.

  Jenny : [defending herself]  Give me a break. I screwed Juan and Pete, and those guys aren't dead.

  Putman Livingston : [feeling hurt that Jenny never had sex with him]  Bloody hell, Jen! Am I the only one?

• Jenny : [on TV, doing her "Pump Up With Amy Aerobics" show]  Here are humans, here is God, and here are we. You're the girl, Ame!