Around the Horn (2002– )

Woody Paige: Self

Quotes 

• Woody : Let me straighten you guys out.

• Woody : [to Jay Mariotti]  Jabronie, you just don't get it!

• Woody : A starting player should never lose his job due to industry!

• Woody : [to Mariotti]  I may have laryngitis but I can still talk better than you!

• Woody : [on steroids]  If looks like a duck, quacks like a duck, and it's bill is shrinking, then it's on something!

• Woody : Today marks the anniversary of the founding of the National Basketball Assoction... Association...

• Woody : [talking to his toy parrot]  Can you say, "Mariotti is a jabroni"?

• Woody : [on Mariotti]  How can a man be so wrong, so often?

• Woody : Three words, Mariotti: You are a fool!

• Jay Mariotti : [on the NFL Network]  Anything with the NFL's logo on it succeeds. Have you heard of Snickers?

  Woody : [mocking]  Have you ever heard of the Arizona Cardinals?

• Woody : [after Richard Justice is introduced]  You know, even though Mariotti isn't here, it's still nice to have a "Richard" around.

  Stat Boy : You can't say that...

• Woody : [written on his blackboard]  "Pirates Arrrr Cool".

• Woody : [written on his blackboard]  "Cadillac = Lack of Cattle".

• [repeated line] 

  Woody : Look at the schedule, guys!

• Woody : [to Blackistone]  You know that baldness is in, so when the aliens come, they'll relate to you... Kevin!

• Woody : I really enjoyed Jay being in New York. We hung out and got to play games. We played "horse"... I was the front end and Jay played himself.

• Woody : [written on his blackboard]  Geography is everywhere.

• Woody : [written on his blackboard]  Geology Rocks!

• Woody : Let's examine this intelligently for a change...