Hitch (I) (2005)
Eva Mendes: Sara
Photos
Quotes
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Sara : Why don't you go hit a titty bar with your buddy Vance?
Hitch : Wow. I don't believe this. That's your source?
Sara : You buried yourself, Alex.
Hitch : Then you weren't listening.
Sara : I heard every word. You're a scam artist. You trick women into getting...
Hitch : Into getting out of their own way, so great guys like Albert Brennaman have a fighting chance!
[host gestures for him to leave]
Hitch : Okay, no, no, no, no. I want everybody to take a good look at this right now. Because this, this right here, this is exactly why falling in love is so goddamn hard!
Speed Dating Guy : Sir, let's go, now.
Hitch : And Vance Munson is a pig! And I refused to work with him. You need to get your facts right. It's because of jerks like him that I even have a job... *had* a job!
[walks away]
Sara : Can you believe that guy?
Casey Sedgewick : Actually... I do.
Sara : [dejectedly] Me, too.
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Hitch : Now, on the one hand, it is very difficult for a man to even speak to someone who looks like you. But, on the other hand, should that be your problem?
Sara : So life's kind of hard all around.
Hitch : Not if you pay attention. I mean, you're sending all the right signals - no earrings, heels under two inches, your hair is pulled back, you're wearing reading glasses with no book, drinking a Grey Goose martini, which means you had a hell of a week and a beer just wouldn't do it. And if that wasn't clear enough, there's always the "fuck off" sign that you have stamped on your forehead.
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Sara : }: If he's stupid enough to cheat, the world should know he's dumb enough to get caught.
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Chip : I noticed your glass was getting a little low so I took the liberty of bringing you another apple martini.
Sara : [bemused] Thank you.
Chip : And I couldn't help but notice... you look a lot like my next girlfriend.
Sara : What's your name?
Chip : They call me Chip.
Sara : Aww, you can't get them to stop?
Chip : [laughs] That was funny.
Sara : Listen, Chip, I understand the courage it takes to walk across a room and try to generate a relationship out of thin air, so don't take the following personally...
Chip : You have fantastic eyes.
Sara : [chuckles] Thanks, try to listen. I... uh, this is no reflection on you, I'm just not interested. But thank you for the compliment of coming over.
Chip : You're welcome. So, do you like Cuban food?
Sara : Chip, seriously, that wasn't code for "I wish you'd try harder".
Chip : Are you always so shut down and afraid? That the right man might make you feel...
Hitch : [puts a hand on Chip's shoulder] ... Feel like a natural woman?
[laughs]
Hitch : Sorry, I'm late, honey, I couldn't get a cab. How was the meeting?
Sara : Ooh. Well, there was a beginning, a middle... and an end. Nice to meet you, Chip.
Chip : [stands up to walk away] You, too.
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Sara : Relationships are for people who are just waiting for something better to come along.
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Sara : [on the phone talking to Geoff] Did I call it or did I call it? I mean, what did I say, six months? And when was her first date? So five-and-a-half? God, I hate it when I'm right. I mean, what is it about guys that makes them want to screw anything that walks, even when they're going out with someone as awesome as Allegra Cole? I mean, she's only the single most fabulous thing walking around New York.
[takes a paper from the newsstand]
Sara : Thanks, Young.
[back to phone]
Sara : Are you kidding? Of course I'm going to run it! Why should she waste her heart on some Swedish aristo-brat, even if he is gorgeous? Hey, if he's stupid enough to cheat, then the world should know he's dumb enough to get caught.
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Vance : Okay, okay. How much will it cost me to stay out of this?
Sara : I don't want money. I want a name.
Vance : I don't know his name.
Sara : Well what do you know?
Vance : I know this.
[hands her Hitch's business card]
Vance : All this for a lousy lay. Are we satisfied?
Sara : Almost.
[knees Vance in the crotch]
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Sara : So how'd you meet him?
Casey Sedgewick : I was in La Perla just buying some weekend thongs.
Sara : And he was doing likewise?
Casey Sedgewick : No. Actually he said he was buying something for his mom.
Sara : His mom? Casey, who buys high-priced lingerie for their mother?
Casey Sedgewick : Well, maybe he was looking for a robe.
Sara : Oh Casey. Casey, he was hitting on you while he was buying lingerie for another woman.
Casey Sedgewick : Well, I prefer the mother story.
Sara : I know you prefer it, but that's not the point.
Casey Sedgewick : No, the point is I'm not gonna start out assuming the guy's a liar.
Sara : Why not?
Casey Sedgewick : Because, that's how you wind up...
[pause]
Sara : Like *me?* Is that what you were gonna say?
Casey Sedgewick : No, I was going to say 'like you.'