All in the Family (TV Series)

Cousin Maude's Visit (1971)

Jean Stapleton: Edith Bunker

Photos 

Quotes 

• Archie Bunker : [Maude refuses to get out of Archie's chair]  Well, I got the secret weapon that can lay this little lady right away. Here we go. This country was ruined by Franklin Delano Roosevelt!

  Cousin Maude : You're fat.

  Archie Bunker : Sticks and stones may break my bones, but Franklin Delano Roosevelt...

  Edith Bunker : Archie, you promised never to say that name again in front of Maude.

  Archie Bunker : Franklin Delano Roosevelt!

  Edith Bunker : [to Maude]  He don't mean nothing. His whole family was for Roosevelt.

  Archie Bunker : That was for two terms. But that was it. We didn't know the guy was going to hold on to the job like a pope!

• Edith Bunker : And how do you two feel this morning?

  Michael 'Meathead' Stivic : Well, my temperature's down to a hundred, but my throat still feels bad. My eyes are clearing up, but my nasal passages...

  Gloria Bunker-Stivic : Oh, who cares Michael, who cares? Do you know what he did to me? He set the alarm to wake himself up every two hours all night long so he could gargle, take his pills, wheeze on his inhaler for ten minutes. You know something Michael? When you're sick, you're sick!

• Edith Bunker : [Edith suddenly does not look well]  Maude!

  Archie Bunker : Whoa, Edith, what's the matter?

  Edith Bunker : Archie, when you first got sick, where did it hit you?

  Archie Bunker : Aw Edith, you know where it hit me.

  Edith Bunker : Mike, what about you?

  Michael 'Meathead' Stivic : It was my head, suddenly I got dizzy.

  Edith Bunker : Gloria?

  Gloria Bunker-Stivic : Suddenly I felt nauseous and started throwing up.

  Edith Bunker : THAT'S THE ONE!

• Edith Bunker : [runs up the stairs]  I'm sick!

  Archie Bunker : Edith, you can't be sick, who's gonna take care of us?

  Maude : [taps his shoulder]  Maudie's here.