- The department staff all fear catching a cold. Ms. Brahms swaps counters with Mr. Lucas to avoid catching anything from Mrs. Slocombe; meanwhile Mr. Lucas hopes to fake an illness so he can go home early.
- It's a hectic day at Grace Brothers during the cold season. Mr. Lucas tries to get off sick with the help of Mr. Mash, an onion and a bar of soap. Miss. Brahms claims she can't catch a cold for seven days due to several recent flu shots. Mrs. Slocombe is trying to ward off her incoming cold with a dash of rum and brandy. And finally, Mr. Humphries and Mr. Grainger have back ache and "a spot of trouble with the gastric" (Mr. Grainger the latter of course). In order to prohibit anyone from leaving the store, Captain Peacock decides to put Mr. Lucas in the ladies' department to replace Miss. Brahms in the gents'. But how on earth is Miss. Brahms supposed to measure an inside leg, while Mr. Lucas struggles to alter a ladies suit?—Nadia Nassar
- Lucas planned to sign in and out 'sick' for a hot date, but Grace Brothers has strict rules and Peacock enforces them with military rigidity, and the onion and soap tricks Mash suggests are known as well as poorly executed, so he only incurs a negative examination by the shop nurse, who finds Slocombe's cold, which scares Brahms, bad enough, but she refuses to miss out on commissions, rather 'self-medicating' with hidden brandy. Peacock allows Brahms to swap sections with Lucas, who now has to handle a frisky lady customer ALterantins play the lead in tricking customers into unfit purchases. Humphries arrived crooked after a bad yoga exercise but soldiers on, while Grainger has to dash off to the loo almost constantly. Mash's last resort for Lucas, falling over soap, has an undesired effect as Mr. Grace arrives.—KGF Vissers
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