- Michael Bluth: Mom wanted me to tell you she doesn't care whether you live or die, but if you're not dead, she would like to see you at the courthouse tomorrow in a blue sweater.
- Buster: Dammit! I hate the blue sweater!
- Michael Bluth: She said it would look nice with the gray pants.
- Buster: Dammit! She's right!
- George Michael Bluth: So, uh, I've been thinking about that conversation we were having the other night about, uh, where Maeby came from. And uh, I was just wondering if you could finish that thought.
- Tobias Fünke: Yes, okay, uh... well, have a seat. Uh... um... when a man... needs to prove to a woman that he's actua- when a man loves a woman, and he actually wants to make love, uh, to her, something very, very special happens. And with deep, deep concentration and, and great focus, he's often able to achieve an erec...
- George Michael Bluth: I'm sorry, I'm going to stop you. I know what you mean. I, I didn't mean babies in general.
- Tobias Fünke: Oh, well that's good. Because it was about to get a little, eh, gross.
- Tobias Fünke: [arguing with Lindsay] Oh, great, you're mocking me. You selfish?
- [realises Maebe is watching]
- Tobias Fünke: country-music loving lady!
- Marta: [to a fighting Michael and Gob] What is wrong with you? I thought you were good people. I thought you were noble. I thought you care about family, but you clearly don't. It's over. Both of you. It's over.
- Buster: Wait, wait. What about... what about me?
- Marta: I'm sorry, I'm not totally sure who you are.
- Buster: Wow. Wow. That's what it feels like to get punched in the face.