Auf Wiedersehen, Pet (TV Series)

Home Thoughts from Abroad (1983)

Tim Healy: Dennis Patterson

Photos 

Quotes 

• Dennis : What time did you come in last night, like? It must have been late, because I was in bed at midnight, you weren't there.

  Neville : It's just as well, isn't it? Otherwise the lads might talk.

• Dennis : And another thing, let's have all those pornographic pin-ups off your locker, right?

  Oz : That's not pornography, man, Dennis. That's art.

  Dennis : What, Fräulein Oktober's art?

  Oz : Aye.

• Wayne Norris : How's your willpower getting on Moxey? Looks as though it's had enough ridicule to me, son.

  Oz Osborne : Here son, have a smell of that.

  [Oz holds a glass of beer to Moxey's nose] 

  Oz Osborne : Breath deeply, son.

  Wayne Norris : He's going, he's going.

  Albert Moxey : I'm sorry Barry, but I could murder a pint.

  Wayne Norris : Get in there, sunbeam. I think that'll be just the one apple juice please, squire.

  Barry Taylor : You know what you are, don't you, Moxey. You're a Judas.

  Oz Osborne : Ahhh, that was the word I was trying to think of tonight.

  Dennis Patterson : Aye well it's the Bible again, see, it's not your strong point, Oz.

  Oz Osborne : I wanted to call Neville that.

  Wayne Norris : What's Neville done to incur your wrath then, eh?

  Oz Osborne : Well he's not here, is he? Three nights running this, you know.

  [Mocks Neville] 

  Oz Osborne : "I'm not coming out, I want to go for a walk"

  Dennis Patterson : Look that's because the man is trying to save some money man, Oz.

  Oz Osborne : Eh?

  Dennis Patterson : And considering that's where most of his money goes, that's the best place to make economies.

  Oz Osborne : Aye.

  Dennis Patterson : Personally I admire his willpower, me.

  Oz Osborne : Ah, but what's that gotta do with him not coming out on the drink, eh?

• Herr Ulrich : Oh, one other thing. There are strange happenings at the hut.

  Neville Hope : What sort of happenings?

  Herr Ulrich : A patch of earth has been dug up and cordoned off. Why?

  Dennis Patterson : Oh that, that's just a few of the lads making a little garden for theirselves, you know, trying to brighten the place up a bit, like.

  Herr Ulrich : Oh yes I've heard of this English passion for gardening, but I did not think to see it on a German building site.

  Neville Hope : Well, this is our little home now, Herr Ulrich, we've got to make the best of it.

  Dennis Patterson : Yeah.

  Herr Ulrich : Well, you may continue with your work.

  Neville Hope : Very kind of you.

  Oz Osborne : Kind? He probably thought we were digging a tunnel, man.