Batman: The Animated Series (TV Series)

What Is Reality? (1992)

Loren Lester: Robin

Quotes 

• Robin : A pixel is worth a thousand words.

• Robin : You mean that The Riddler is trapped in his own virtual reality ?

  Batman : Yes, and How to get him out? Perhaps a riddle that no one can solve.

• Robin : Batman, I think I figured out the clue. The plane where kings and queens contend could mean a chessboard. Is there a door marked "checkmate" or-or "black and white"?

  Batman : 4096. Wait a minute. There are 64 squares on a chessboard, right?

  Robin : Yeah. So?

  Batman : So, 4096 is 64 squared.

• Riddler : Only you can put the king in check, vigilante. Move according to the rules, or it's the end of the day.

  [Batman moves to escape from the chess pieces; stepping on a square, he falls through, but catches himself on the edge] 

  Riddler : Wrong move, Batman.

  [he pulls himself up and continues the pursuit] 

  Robin : I got it! They call you the Dark Knight, right? Then you have to move like a knight.

  [watching him move] 

  Robin : That's it. Two up, one across. 'Cause a wrong move means the end of the day, or...

  Batman : Knight fall. Of course.

• Riddler : Welcome to Riddlerville, Batman. Things are a little mixed up here, but I'm sure you can fix that. Your commissioner is contained within this cube. Solve the puzzle, and you gain access.

  Robin : No problemo, Batman. That's a Baxter's box. I can guide you through it in...

  [he screams as a loud buzzer rings in his ear] 

  Riddler : No coaching from the peanut gallery. You have one minute, Batman. Then the clock strikes two.

  Batman : If you can do it, so can I.

  [he turns his fists into mallet heads and begins smashing blocks away] 

  Riddler : I should've known you'd cheat.

• Robin : [in the VR world, Batman opens a door labeled "crazy intent"]  Don't open that door! "Crazy intent" means "loco motive"!

• Robin : Sort of like playing a computer game from the inside, isn't it?

  Commissioner Gordon : Amazing. It even feels real.

  Robin : The military's been experimenting with virtual reality for combat simulation.

  Commissioner Gordon : Then what's Nygma doing with it?

  Robin : Nothing now. He can't access this computer; it's not hooked up to a phone line.

  Commissioner Gordon : So why'd he want us to find it?

  Robin : Good question, but there's no way to know 'til I go through all the files. Guess I should get back to work after I grab a snack. You hungry?

  Commissioner Gordon : No, thanks.

  Riddler : Batman's young friend is fairly clever, but he doesn't have all the answers.

• Batman : Virtual reality?

  Riddler : Quite so, Batman. And everything your commissioner is experiencing in here seems so real to him, it might as well be real. I'd give his heart about fifteen minutes, at most.

  Robin : He can't be online! I searched through every file!

  Riddler : You searched the software. Had you bothered to examine the hardware, you would have discovered a cordless modem line.

  [Batman moves to unplug it] 

  Riddler : I wouldn't do that, Batman. Disconnecting Gordon would be fatal. The sudden stop would be like slamming into a brick wall at 400 miles an hour. No, if you wish to get Gordon out alive, Batman, you'll have to come in here and get him.

• Robin : Looked like he suffered some kind of attack; like a sensory overload or something.

  Commissioner Gordon : But we'll never know for sure, 'cause we'll never find him.

  Batman : Oh, no? Come on. I think he left us a clue.

  [dissolve to them arriving at their destination] 

  Batman : "If the planet were equitable, I'd still have my old job."

  Robin : Of course. "If the world's fair, I'd still have my ex-position." Oh, give me a break.

• Robin : What we've got here is a variation on the ancient Chinese puzzle box.

  Batman : Can you solve it?

  Robin : You kidding? You're looking at the guy who solved the Baxter's box puzzle in 37 seconds. Of course, this time I don't have a sledgehammer.

• Dick Grayson : [in line at the DMV]  Stop whining, Alfred. If you think the ticket's a mistake, you'll get a chance to tell the whole story to the clerk when we get up there.

  Alfred Pennyworth : If I live that long.