Blackadder (TV Series)

The Queen of Spain's Beard (1983)

Brian Blessed: King Richard IV

Photos 

Quotes 

• King Richard IV : [laughs]  Ah, Harry, the gentle art of diplomacy! But you well know where the real secret of diplomacy lies, don't you, my boy...

  Harry, Prince of Wales : Well, actually, I don't, Father, but I would like to know.

  King Richard IV : [points to Harry's groin]  There.

  Harry, Prince of Wales : [lifts his robes]  Are you sure? I can't imagine anything of any real interest down there.

  King Richard IV : Let me explain. What's that for?

  Harry, Prince of Wales : Well, a couple of things...

  King Richard IV : Correct, and one of those things is...?

  Harry, Prince of Wales : Best not mentioned, really.

  King Richard IV : Right! And the other is fornication!

• [Richard IV hands over an ornate container] 

  King Richard IV : Chiswick. Give this to the Queen of Naples.

  Lord Chiswick : What is it my Lord?

  King Richard IV : The King of Naples.

• King Richard IV : Chiswick, remind me to send flowers to the King of France in sympathy for the of his son.

  Lord Chiswick : The one you had beheaded, my lord...

  King Richard IV : Yes, that's the fellow.

• 3rd & 4th Messengers : My Lord, news: the Swiss have invaded France.

  King Richard IV : Excellent!

  [to one of his men who is standing in attendance] 

  King Richard IV : Wessex, while they're away, take ten thousand troops and pillage Geneva.

  Lord Chiswick : But the Swiss are our allies, My Lord.

  King Richard IV : Oh yes... Well, er, get them to dress up as Germans, will you?

• King Richard IV : [clapping his hands]  Where is she? Where is she? Where is Princess Leia?

  [Edmund eyes the four beautiful ladies in the room and waits patiently. Princess Leia enters] 

  King Richard IV : Ah, good. Good!

  [to Edmund, who is surprised to see that Princess Leia is a child] 

  King Richard IV : Husband, meet your new wife.

  Princess Leia of Hungary : [very pleased]  Hello Edmund.

  Prince Edmund : [looking displeased]  Hello.

  Princess Leia of Hungary : [suddenly looking displeased]  Are we getting married now?

  Prince Edmund : [slightly happier]  Yes. Yes, I believe we are.

  Princess Leia of Hungary : Come on then.

  [Princess Leia takes Edmund's hand]