Buffy the Vampire Slayer (TV Series)

The I in Team (2000)

Alyson Hannigan: Willow Rosenberg

Photos 

Quotes 

• [first lines] 

  Willow Rosenberg : I implore you, Neisa, blessed goddess of chance and fortune, heed my call. Send to me the heart I desire.

  Xander Harris : [the camera pulls back to show she is holding five cards]  You know, magic at the poker table qualifies as cheating.

  Willow Rosenberg : That wasn't magic. I was praying. Two, please.

• Xander Harris : You are looking at the new local distributor for Boost Bars. "The natural food bar that provides a nutritional energy boost for active, health-conscience people." Want one?

  Willow Rosenberg : No, Thanks. Those things usually taste... kind of tasteless. And then leave a bad aftertastelessness.

  Xander Harris : Well, don't let the healthy scare you. Check out these ingredients. See? Loaded with fatty goodness.

• [Xander, Willow and Anya are playing poker] 

  Xander Harris : Wish the Buff could've made it. This three-hand poker is not quite the game.

  Willow Rosenberg : Guess she's out with Riley. You know how it is with a spanking new boyfriend.

  Anya : Yes, we've enjoyed spanking.

  [the card deck explodes from Xander's hands, and in his embarrassment he changes the subject] 

  Xander Harris : Well, they do seem to fall into the Good Guy camp. I mean, they are anti-demon.

  [Anya gives her a look] 

  Xander Harris : But probably pro ex-demon.

  Willow Rosenberg : Well, they do seem to fall into the Good Guy camp. I mean, they are anti-demon.

  Anya : Maybe. I choose to feel threatened.

  Xander Harris : And why not? There's still heaps we don't know about these commandos. What exactly are they up to?

• Willow Rosenberg : Irony's kind of ironic that way.

• Riley Finn : Talk to me, Forrest.

  Forrest Gates : Signal's somewhere in this neighborhood. Estimate within a two-block radius.

  [in his apartment, Giles is digging into Spike's wound with the tweezers while Anya holds the flashlight for him] 

  Willow Rosenberg : It feels and looks like the ionizing spell is wearing off.

  Xander Harris : Giles?

  Rupert Giles : Uh, I've got it. I've got it!

  [holds up the tweezers with a two-inch dart with a blinking red light] 

  Rupert Giles : [cut to Beta Team getting closer] 

  Riley Finn : Okay, we wanna keep the hostile contained. So no one is to make a move without my...

  Forrest Gates : Wait. Signal's cleared up.

  [points] 

  Forrest Gates : There.

  Riley Finn : Let's go!

  Rupert Giles : Um, go!

  [Giles give tweezers to Xander who races down the hall] 

  Riley Finn : [cut back to Beta Team]  What?

  Forrest Gates : It's on the move.

  Riley Finn : Heading?

  Forrest Gates : Straight at us, forty meters and closing. Moving fast.

  Graham Miller : In broad daylight?

  Riley Finn : Look alive, people. Weapons at the ready.

  Forrest Gates : Twenty-five meters... twenty... fifteen.

  Riley Finn : Where?

  Forrest Gates : To the left. Ten meters... five!

  Riley Finn : Anyone?

  Graham Miller : I got nothing.

  Forrest Gates : This doesn't make sense. It went right past us.

• [Willow, Xander and Anya have been waiting for Buffy at the Bronze; now she shows up with Riley, Forrest, Graham, and others] 

  Buffy Summers : Oh, you know, I didn't think that you would mind. Uh, Riley and the guys were throwing a little impromptu celebration in my honor. And it made it, like, impossible to not invite them.

  Willow Rosenberg : Oh, that's neat about the celebrating. I-I just thought this was supposed to be, you know, us. Just the Scooby corps, you know? I mean, I could have invited somebody else if I knew it was an open free-for-all.

  Buffy Summers : I'm sorry. I had no idea. My total bad. So, who did you want to invite?

  Willow Rosenberg : What?

  Buffy Summers : You said you wanted to invite someone.

  Willow Rosenberg : No, not... No one. I mean... I meant a hypothetical someone, which is to say no one.