Clueless (TV Series)

Kiss Me Kip (1996)

Nicole Eggert: Summer Bonet

Quotes 

• Mel Horowitz : [answering machine]  You've reached the home office of Mel Horowitz, please leave a message, thank you.

  [beep] 

  Summer Bonet : [as the girls listen in]  Hello, Mel?

  Mel Horowitz : Hello, hello, I'm here.

  Summer Bonet : Hi, it's Summer Bonet.

  Mel Horowitz : Hi, Summer.

  Cher Horowitz : Dee, the machine didn't click off! Oh, it's private, we shouldn't listen.

  Dionne "Dee" Davenport : [scoffs, rises]  As if!

  [leans gleefully over desk to make the most out of listening in] 

  Summer Bonet : ...calling to discuss Kip's contract.

  Mel Horowitz : Summer, we've been through this before, you're not Kip's manager, and I don't work for you.

  Summer Bonet : [sneers]  Yeah, and I told you that I am playing the female lead in Tarantula, even if Kip has to stop production to make it happen, okay?

  [sneers] 

  Summer Bonet : Come on, he's a two-bit hack, he's so dumb, he'll do whatever I tell him to. Goodbye, Mel.

  [dial tone] 

  Cher Horowitz : This is a disaster. This is just like when they gave Demi Moore twelve million dollars for Striptease.

  [there's something on her chair when she sits down] 

  Dionne "Dee" Davenport : You knew it was gonna crash and burn,

  [Cher is surprised by what she found] 

  Dionne "Dee" Davenport : but there was nothing you could do to stop it.

  Cher Horowitz : [sharply inhaling her breath]  Oh my God!

  [rushing forward with her find] 

  Cher Horowitz : I can't believe it! Heart attack! Kip's... date-book!

  Dionne "Dee" Davenport : [scoffs]  Don't taunt me, Cher.

  Cher Horowitz : No, it's his, look! Costume fittings, workout schedules, interviews...

  [as Dee takes a whiff of the manly scent of the address book] 

  Cher Horowitz : He must have left it for a reason, subconsciously. Like, he wanted someone to find it, and help him...

• Kip Killmore : [inside the restaurant]  Look, Summer, I'm really sorry, I have no idea how all these people knew that we were gonna be here.

  Summer Bonet : Oh, I don't care.

  [little laugh] 

  Summer Bonet : You know, it's just I wanted to be alone with you, you know, so we could talk about your future and, uh, that contract... cos you know that I care so much about you... and you definitely need a guardian to take care of all that talent.

  Kip Killmore : Yeah. And no one else cares about my talent.

  [she giggles] 

  Cher Horowitz : [voiceover]  All I could do was watch helplessly as Summer weaved her vixen web, and then suddenly an even more hideous obstacle.

  Amber Mariens : [arriving]  Uhm, Kip,

  [gushes] 

  Amber Mariens : I really hate to bother you, but... would you mind if I had a picture with you?

  Kip Killmore : Hey, sure.

  [Summer scowls] 

  Kip Killmore : Ah, but just... just one.

• Amber Mariens : [faked coughing]  Excuse me, I'm sorry, I'm just... really allergic to cheap perfume.

  [to Summer:] 

  Amber Mariens : Could you just create some distance so that I can breathe?

  Summer Bonet : [seething]  I'll be at the bar.

  [leaves] 

  Kip Killmore : [going after her]  Summer! Summer, wait!

  Cher Horowitz : [voiceover]  This was it! Amber had unwittingly created my window of opportunity.

  Kip Killmore : [catching up to Summer]  Listen...

  Cher Horowitz : [closing in]  Excuse me...

  Kip Killmore : [stopping in his tracks]  It's you!

  Cher Horowitz : Hello...?

  Kip Killmore : Summer, this is the girl that's been causing me all those problems.

  [cellphone in hand, pointing at Cher:] 

  Kip Killmore : Stay!

  [on phone:] 

  Kip Killmore : Mel? Kip. Listen, I want you to take out a restraining order on this teenager. Oh, she's blond, about fifteen, and never leaves a person alone! Yeah? Yeah?

  [to Cher:] 

  Kip Killmore : Is your name Cher?

  Cher Horowitz : [takes the phone from him]  Hi, Daddy. Sorry, I'm going to fix this, and I will call you right back.

  Kip Killmore : You're Mel's daughter?

  Cher Horowitz : Yeah. And there's something I think you should hear.

  Summer Bonet : [on tape]  "And I told you that I am playing the female lead in Tarantula, even if Kip has to stop production to make..."

  [she tries to grab the device] 

  Summer Bonet : Give me that!

  [recording continues:] 

  Summer Bonet : "I mean, come on, he's a two-bit hack! He's so dumb, he's gonna do whatever I tell him to."

  [to Kip:] 

  Summer Bonet : Kip! Kip, it was just negotiating, you know? I... I was playing hardball.

  Kip Killmore : [stunned]  You called me... a hack.

  Summer Bonet : Yeah. Well, I mean... it was, it was a tactic, you know, a strategy.

  Kip Killmore : You know what, Summer? I don't think this relationship is exactly what I thought it was. I think you'd better leave.

  Summer Bonet : Fine, if that's the way you want it after everything that I have done for you.

  [turns, glares at Cher, scoffs, leaves] 

  Cher Horowitz : [to Kip, who is looking at her with new eyes]  I know I have been such a mosquito, but I just had to warn you.