The Critic (TV Series)

L.A. Jay (1994)

Billy Crystal: Gary Grossman

Quotes 

• Jay Sherman : All right, it's just you and me. Now what did you think of my script?

  Gary Grossman : It was excrement.

  Jay Sherman : Did you say "it was excellent?"

  Gary Grossman : It was crummy.

  Jay Sherman : Did you say "it was yummy?"

  Gary Grossman : It was an awful piece of junk that made me want to puke all night.

  Jay Sherman : Did you say "it was an awesome piece of spunk that you want to shoot tonight?"

  Gary Grossman : It was a bilious piece of dirt that made cry out in pain.

  Jay Sherman : Did you say "it was a brilliant piece of work, and you'll fly me out to Spain? Where we'll meet King Juan Carlos and drink sangria all night?"

  Gary Grossman : You piece of blech.