The Dick Van Dyke Show (TV Series)

You Ought to Be in Pictures (1966)

Mary Tyler Moore: Laura Petrie

Quotes 

• Rob Petrie : Well, Mr. Merkle and I had little difference of opinion.

  Laura Petrie : About what?

  Rob Petrie : Well, I wanted to play the part MY way and he kept insisting I do it RIGHT.

• Rob Petrie : I offered to do a little punching up of the script.

  Laura Petrie : Are you gonna be paid?

  Rob Petrie : No.

  Laura Petrie : Well, then the whole thing is more like a glorified home movie, huh?

• Laura Petrie : Ah, Rob, I just think you ought to find out a little more about it before you commit yourself.

  Rob Petrie : Well, I know everything.

  Laura Petrie : When do you start?

  Rob Petrie : Oh, I don't know.

  Laura Petrie : You have to join a union?

  Rob Petrie : G... I don't know.

  Laura Petrie : How long is it gonna take?

  Rob Petrie : Well, I... I don't know. I better find out more about this.

• Laura Petrie : You have something terrible to tell me, don't you?

  Rob Petrie : No.

  Laura Petrie : Yeah, I think you do.

  Rob Petrie : Honey, that's a picture of the camera.

  Laura Petrie : The what?

  Rob Petrie : The... that's the... the... girl who's gonna play Rita Rivera.

  Laura Petrie : And instead of the lens, you're gonna be kissing HER?

  Rob Petrie : May I?

• Rob Petrie : Honey, the reason I brought this home was to discover just how upset you'd be if I made love to her. Obv... you know... within the confines of my movie career.

  Laura Petrie : Well, how upset do you THINK I should be... within the confines of your movie career?

  Rob Petrie : Well, I'd... based on what you know about me, I'd say not at all; but, uh, based on what you've seen of her, I-I'd... quite a bit.