- Edna Garrett: Jo, why don't you audition for a part?
- Jo Polniaczek: No way, I'm not gonna get up there and make a fool out of myself.
- Blair Warner: But you do it so well!
- Dorothy 'Tootie' Ramsey: I bet you were the one who put Pine Sol in my prop shampoo bottle. While I washed that man right out of my hair, I could have scrubbed the sink too!
- Natalie Green: The yellow one was your shampoo bottle? What a silly mix-up. I guess that means Mrs. Garrett was Sassooning the kitchen floor.
- Edna Garrett: [re school play South Pacific] Hey, Jo, why don't you try out for something this year?
- Jo Polniaczek: [shakes her head] No way. I'm not gonna stand up here and make a fool of myself.
- Blair Warner: Why not? You do it so well.
- Edna Garrett: [re the painted backdrops] Blair, how are you doing with the scenery?
- Blair Warner: I'm not sure.
- Jo Polniaczek: [surveys critically] What is it?
- Blair Warner: It's a hibiscus bush. What did you think it was?
- Jo Polniaczek: A killer brussel sprout.
- Edna Garrett: Don't worry, Blair. Only God can make a tree.