Family Guy (TV Series)

Peter's Got Woods (2005)

Alex Borstein: Lois Griffin

Photos 

Quotes 

• Peter Griffin : So, Brian, you ready to go play some darts at the Clam?

  Brian Griffin : Oh, sorry, Peter, I can't make it tonight. I have a date.

  [in surprise, Peter spits out his milk all over Meg] 

  Meg Griffin : Dad!

  Peter Griffin : But you were supposed to drive tonight! What am I supposed to do? If I drive, I'll have to have a bunch of drinks first, because I am very self-conscious about my driving.

  Stewie Griffin : Oh, you've got a date. What's his name? HA! Do you see? Do you see that? Do you see what I did? I made it seem as though you were a homosexual. That's funny to me.

  Lois Griffin : How exciting, Brian! So, who's the lucky lady?

  Brian Griffin : Well, um, actually her name is Shauna Parks.

  Lois Griffin : Meg's teacher?

  [Peter spits out his milk a second time, again all over Meg] 

• Peter Griffin : Me? Go to a PTA meeting? What, are you high?

  Lois Griffin : Nah, not anymore, I crashed hours ago. By the way, we are out of chips, cookies, and funnybones.