Family Guy (TV Series)

To Love and Die in Dixie (2001)

Mike Henry: John Herbert

Quotes 

• Machine : You have 113 new messages.

  [Phone starts to beep] 

  Lois Griffin : Oh my!

  Herbert : Uh, yeah, I was just wonderin', uh... where the newspaper boy was.

  [beep] 

  Herbert : Haven't seen the newspaper in a couple days. Wonderin' if he ever gon' come back.

  [beep] 

  Herbert : Guess who? Sorry to leave you so many messages. Just lonely here. Thinkin' about the muscly-armed paperboy. Wishin' he'd come by and bring me some good news.

  [beep] 

  Herbert : Where are ya?

  [beep] 

  Herbert : Ah, you're startin' to piss me off, you little piggly sumbitch. Call me.

• Herbert : Hey, muscly arm, why the long face?

  Chris : It's this girl. I can't talk to her. It's like girls are a different species or something.

  Herbert : Who needs them? You like Popsicles?

  Chris : Well, sure.

  Herbert : Then you need to come on down to the cellar. I got a whole freezer full of Popsicles.

  Chris : No, thanks. I gotta get going.

  Herbert : Don't make me beg now.

  Chris : You're funny. Bye.

  Herbert : Get your fat ass back here.