Firefly (TV Series)

War Stories (2002)

Nathan Fillion: Captain Malcolm 'Mal' Reynolds

Photos 

Quotes 

• [last lines] 

  Hoban 'Wash' Washburne : Mmmm. Wife soup. I must have done good.

  Zoë Washburne : Yes, dear. You done good.

  Mal : Ow.

  [sighs] 

  Mal : Did you tell her?

  Hoban 'Wash' Washburne : Tell her what?

  Mal : Your husband has demanded that we sleep together.

  Zoë Washburne : Really?

  Hoban 'Wash' Washburne : What? Mal, come on.

  Mal : He seems to think it would get all this burning sexual tension out in the open. You know, make a fair fight for your womanly affections.

  Hoban 'Wash' Washburne : No. That was the torture talking. Remember the torture?

  Mal : I know it's a difficult mission but you and I... have to get it on.

  Zoë Washburne : I understand. We have no choice.

  [deadpan] 

  Zoë Washburne : Take me, sir. Take me hard.

  Jayne Cobb : Now, something about that is just downright unsettling.

  [Clattering] 

  Hoban 'Wash' Washburne : We'll be in our bunk.

  Jayne Cobb : Oh, hey. Free soup.

• [Mal is struggling with a guy who spent several hours torturing him; Jayne aims a gun at the torturer] 

  Zoë : Jayne. This is something the captain has to do for himself.

  Mal : No. No, it's not!

  Zoë : Oh!

  [Jayne, Zoë and Wash shoot] 

• Mal : I love the pitter-patter of tiny feet in huge combat boots... SHUT UP!

• Mal : There's plenty orders a'mine that she didn't obey.

  Wash : Name one!

  Mal : She married you!

• Niska : [as he tortures Mal]  Do you know the writings of Shan Yu ?

  Mal : [growls in pain]  You starting a book club ?

• Mal : [as Niska cowers]  Looks like business ain't runnin' so much as crawlin' away. You wanna meet the real me now?

• Mal : One of you is gonna fall and die and I'm not cleaning it up.

• Mal : [Niska hears the alarms while he is torturing Mal]  Listen, if you've got guests, I can come back later.

• Wash : So, I'm Zoë. Now, what do I do?

  Mal : Probably not talk quite so much.

  Wash : Right. Less talking. She's terse - I can be terse. Once, in flight school, I was laconic.

• Wash : I mean, I'm the one that she swore to love, honor, and obey.

  Mal : Listen - She swore to obey?

  Wash : Well, no. Not... But that's just my point. You she obeys! She obeys you. There's obeying going on right under my nose!

• Mal : And you understand what Zoe's job entails?

  Wash : I'll learn as I go.

  [Wash hauls an apparently heavy crate after landing at the drop location] 

  Wash : So, now, I'm learning about carrying.

  [Niska's men killed the buyers and hold Mal and Wash at gunpoint] 

  Wash : Now, I'm learning about scary!

• Niska : [sing-songie]  Mr. Reynolds...

  Mal : [moans] 

  Niska : You died, Mr. Reynolds.

  Mal : Seemed like the thing to do.

  Niska : When you die, I can't hurt you any more. And I want two days at least, minimum.

• Mal : Okay, um, I'm lost. Uh, I'm angry and I'm armed...