- Fred Flintstone: [Fred and Barney are glued to a bowling ball, and are trying to get it off with a hammer & chisel] Okay, Barney, one good whack should do it. When I nod my head, hit it.
- Barney Rubble: If you say so, Fred.
- Fred Flintstone: [Nods. Barney hits him in the head with the hammer] Not my head, you dope! The ball!
- Fred Flintstone: H-H-He just tried to f-freeze me to death in a c-c-cold shower.
- Barney Rubble: But I always take a cold shower in the morning.
- Betty Rubble: That's right, he does.
- Fred Flintstone: [yelling] YEAH, BUT I DON'T!
- Fred Flintstone: Well, Barney, how does it feel to be the best friend of a millionaire?
- Barney Rubble: [laughs] I don't know, Fred. You still owe me five bucks from the last time you was gonna be a millionaire.
- Fred Flintstone: That's the trouble with you, Barney. All you think about is bowling or shooting pool. Well, it's us guys who think of something constructive that are going to make it to the top someday.
- Barney Rubble: Is that so?
- Fred Flintstone: Yeah, that's so. Now, uh, take me for instance. I'm inventing a new soft drink. Try some.
- Barney Rubble: No, thanks. Knowing your inventions, I'll stick to grape juice.
- [Fred and Barney, still stuck to the bowling ball, enter the doctor's office]
- Nurse: The bowling alley is down the street, gentlemen. This is a doctor's office.
- Fred Flintstone: [sarcastically] Very funny. You ought to be on TV. Look, can the doctor remove a bowling ball?
- Nurse: Well, he's really more of a golfer.
- Quartz: [upon seeing Fred and Barney glued to the bowling ball] Hiya, Fred, Barney. Hey, the bowling alley is down the street, fellas.
- Fred Flintstone: Look, if I want laughs, I'll call Yogi Bear.
- Fred Flintstone: Remember, Wilma, behind every great man there's a woman.
- Barney Rubble: Yeah, telling him what he's doing wrong.
- Dr. Bonestitch: Well, well, well, fine day, isn't it? Now, don't be afraid. Just tell me which one is sick.
- Fred Flintstone: Well, uh, it's kinda silly. You see, me and my pal here are stuck together, you see?
- Dr. Bonestitch: [uses his stethoscope on the bowling ball] Very interesting. Hmm, no pulse at all. Are you sure you're alive?
- Fred Flintstone: That ain't me, that's the bowling ball you're listening to!
- Dr. Bonestitch: Bowling ball? Oh, the bowling alley is down the street.
- Fred Flintstone: We know that! We wanna get rid of the bowling ball!
- Dr. Bonestitch: Sorry, I already have a bowling ball.
- Barney Rubble: Oh, boy. I wish I had a dime for every time Fred was gonna be a millionaire. Heh heh! I'd be a millionaire.
- Wilma Flintstone: Honestly, you two amaze me. Who else could get themselves glued to a bowling ball?
- Betty Rubble: I always knew our husbands were close, but this is too much.
- Barney Rubble: Yeah, we're like two peas in a pod. Heh-heh! There's an inseparable bond that binds us together.
- [Barney laughs and Fred hits him on the head with the bowling ball]
- Betty Rubble: Fred Flintstone, how dare you?
- Fred Flintstone: Well, he keeps asking for it.
- Dr. Bonestitch: Aha! The x-ray machine has given me the answer to your trouble, gentlemen. You two are stuck to a bowling ball.
- Fred Flintstone: What are you, a comedian? WE KNOW WE'RE STUCK TO A BOWLING BALL!
- Dr. Bonestitch: Well, now you have medical evidence to back it up.
- Barney Rubble: Fred, I want a glass of water.
- Fred Flintstone: Huh? What? Oh sure.
- [starts to get it]
- Fred Flintstone: Hey! Wait a minute! What do you think this is, a hotel?
- Barney Rubble: But Fred, I'm thirsty.
- Fred Flintstone: You're thirsty? Well allow me!
- [Pours a pitcher of water over Barney's head, then crowns him with the pitcher.]
- Barney Rubble: Aw Fred. How could you do that to your closest friend?
- Fred Flintstone: [Fred & Barney are testing the glue by lifting an elephant with a rope] We did it! The glue is holding!
- Barney Rubble: Congratulations Fred! Let me be the first to shake your hand.
- [Lets go of the rope]
- Fred Flintstone: Barney! Don't let go of the rope!
- [the elephant falls and pulls Fred down on top of him]
- Elephant: [to Fred] Will you get off my back?