- Mesmo: Now, then, what do you think you are? A bird, a cat, a frog?
- Fred Flintstone: Uh, no, i-it's not me. It's my friend. He thinks he's a dog.
- Mesmo: Where is he?
- Fred Flintstone: At the dog pound.
- Mesmo: That figures.
- [Wilma and Betty are watching television]
- Announcer: [on TV] And now, ladies and gentlemen, it's a great pleasure to bring you Mesmo the world's greatest hypnotist.
- [Fred and Barney dash in, sit on their wives' laps, not noticing them, and change the channel]
- Baseball Broadcaster: It's a line drive to left field, and O'Toole is rounding first. He's starting for second.
- Fred Flintstone: Come on, O'Toole, slide, slide!
- Wilma Flintstone: Fred?
- Fred Flintstone: Yeah, Wilma?
- Wilma Flintstone: Will you kindly get off my lap?
- Fred Flintstone: Huh?
- [turns around]
- Fred Flintstone: Wilma, what are you doing here?
- Wilma Flintstone: For your information, I was watching my favorite program, The Great Mesmo.
- Betty Rubble: Don't you think you're a little old to be sitting on Mommy's lap, Barney?
- [Fred and Barney get off their wives]
- Fred Flintstone: I'm sorry, Wilma. I guess I didn't see you.
- [chuckles nervously]
- Wilma Flintstone: Well, you see me now, and I'll thank you to put my program back on.
- Fred Flintstone: But, Wilma, Barney and I are watching the ball game. We always watch the game on Saturday. You know that.
- Betty Rubble: Right, you watch the ball game at our house and we watch The Great Mesmo here. That's the deal we made, isn't it?
- Fred Flintstone: Well, yeah, but... but... but... but...
- Wilma Flintstone: If you like sports so much, Fred, why don't you be one and stick to our deal?
- Fred Flintstone: But... But... But, eh, but me and Barn... we... Oh, come on, Barney. Women always win when they appeal to a man's chivalry. What gripes me is I bet in the future people will think we cavemen had it all our own way with women.
- Betty Rubble: Barney, just what did happen today?
- Barney Rubble: I won't know until I check with Fred.
- [Barney is carrying Betty's package in his mouth, while walking on fours]
- Barney Rubble: And, boy, have I got a lot of questions for that guy.
- Dog Catcher: Sure, I've seen your program, Mr. Mesmo. Oh, but let me get this straight. You wanna change a dog into a human, right?
- Mesmo: Well, to speed things up, yes, that's right.
- Dog Catcher: Okay, try it, but I got 10 bucks that says you can't do it.
- Mesmo: It's a bet. Now which one is it, Mr. Flintstone?
- Fred Flintstone: [looking at Barney among the dogs] There he is. There, the cute one. The one sitting up in the corner.
- Mesmo: Mm-hmm. Attention! Attention!
- Fred Flintstone: He's looking right at you, Mezz.
- Mesmo: When I clap my hands, you are no longer a dog. You are a human.
- [Mesmo claps his hands and Barney reverts back to normal]
- Barney Rubble: Hey, Fred, what happened? Uh. What am I doing down here with all these mutts?
- Fred Flintstone: You did it, Mezz! Barney ain't a dog no more!
- Mesmo: Yeah, well, just keep it quiet. Hmm?
- [Mesmo, with ten dollars, leaves with Fred and Barney]
- Dog Catcher: Well, there they go. That Mesmo is good, or it's a racket. Either way, I'm out 10 bucks.
- Shaggy Dog: Hey, you with the funny hat. Look down here. We demand our release, Warden.
- Short Dog: Yeah, I wanna see the public defender.
- Shaggy Dog: I know my rights. I wanna use the phone.
- Short Dog: Let us out, or I'll sue the city.
- Dog Catcher: Oh, no! The dogs think they're human now!
- Shaggy Dog: What's he talking about? There's no dogs around here.
- Dog Catcher: Oh, it just isn't my day! Just isn't my day!
- Fred Flintstone: [about Barney] I don't get it. He's only been a dog for 20 minutes and he hates vets already.
- Wilma Flintstone: Look who's coming, Betty. It's Einstein and company.
- Betty Rubble: Hm. Hello, Barney. Where have you been?
- Wilma Flintstone: Yeah, what have you scientists been up to?
- Fred Flintstone: Uh, up to? Who, us? Heh heh. What do you mean?
- Wilma Flintstone: Uh-oh. When it starts like that, it's days before I found out the truth.
- Barney Rubble: [after Fred destroys the TV aerial] But how are we gonna watch the game?
- Barney Rubble: [bird's egg rolls off the roof and lands on Fred's head. Barney is clearly amused] Hey, answer me that one, egghead!
- Fred Flintstone: [Fred and Barney are watching a baseball game at Barney's house, when all of a sudden the tv picture scrambles] Hey, what happened?
- Barney Rubble: I don't know Fred. Starts acting up like that every once and a while.
- Fred Flintstone: Did you check the tubes?
- Barney Rubble: Yep. They're okay.
- Fred Flintstone: How's your antenna?
- Barney Rubble: Fine, Fred. How's yours?
- [Barney starts to laugh]
- Fred Flintstone: Very funny. That's a real double-dandy yack-yack. Now cut the clownin' and let's check it before we miss the whole game.
- Barney Rubble: Sorry Fred.