The Flintstones (TV Series)

This Is Your Lifesaver (1962)

Mel Blanc: Barney Rubble

Photos 

Quotes 

• Barney Rubble : [about a man-eating barracuspid fish]  Hey, pretty fierce looking, huh, Fred?

  Fred Flintstone : Hmm...

  Barney Rubble : Fred? What do you think?

  Fred Flintstone : Nah. After seeing Gypsum tear up 10 pounds of stegosaurus steak Friday, I wouldn't give this fish an even chance with him.

• Fred Flintstone : I told Wilma how she can economize and save 500 bucks a year on the grocery bill alone.

  Barney Rubble : Oh, you gonna cut out your midnight raids on the icebox?

  Fred Flintstone : No, I'm gonna cancel the big food disposal unit Wilma was expecting... her mother. She eats like a seven-year locust, only she comes here every seven months.

  Barney Rubble : You're lucky, Fred. Look at poor Harvey Boxite. He's been married 12 years and his mother-in-law only visited him once.

  Fred Flintstone : What's so bad about that?

  Barney Rubble : She came the day after they was married, and never left!

• Barney Rubble : Yes, sir. I always say a couple of good nights sleep will straighten anybody out, except you, Fred.

  [a tired Fred mumbles] 

  Barney Rubble : Gee, your eyes look like someone pried the covers off two cans of red paint. Hey, uh, didn't you get any sleep last night either?

  Fred Flintstone : No.

  Barney Rubble : That's three nights running. You got insomnia.

  Fred Flintstone : No, I got a house guest.

  Barney Rubble : What's that got to do with it?

  Fred Flintstone : Did you ever try sleeping in a rocking chair without a safety belt?

  Barney Rubble : How come you slept in a rocking chair?

  Fred Flintstone : Because Wilma was sleeping on the couch.

  Barney Rubble : Well, how come Wilma was sleeping on the couch?

  Fred Flintstone : Because J. Montague Gypsum was sleeping in both our beds.

  Barney Rubble : Both beds? How come?

  Fred Flintstone : Because J.M. Gypsum got a bad back from sleeping on the couch, so now he has to sleep on the bias across two beds pushed together because Wilma feels sorry for him, AND BECAUSE I'M A BIG STUPID NUT!

• J. Montague Gypsum : I see your scheme. You're trying to talk me into coming home with you. That's your game, isn't it?

  Fred Flintstone : Well, uh, uh, not exactly. You see, I already put my foot down about my mother-in-law coming to visit us.

  J. Montague Gypsum : Ah, you did right. Never admit an outsider into your cherished family circle. It's like letting a camel put his head in your tent.

  Barney Rubble : Hey, he knows your mother-in-law, Fred.

• Fred Flintstone : Okay, let's synchronize our sundials. I got 10:35. What do you got?

  Barney Rubble : A migraine headache.