- Blanche Morton: When I think of my husband going out with Mr. Von Zell, prospecting for uranium, I can't believe it!
- Gracie Allen: Well, you ought to believe it by now. They've been gone for over two days.
- Blanche Morton: [Harry Morton and Harry Von Zell are prospecting for uranium] You know, when he told me he was going to camp out in the desert with Mr. Von Zell, I told him he was crazy!
- Gracie Allen: Well, Harry Von Zell is a little peculiar, but you shouldn't say that about him... Although he says the same thing about your husband.
- Blanche Morton: Oh no, no, no, honey, I meant MY Harry was the one who was crazy.
- Gracie Allen: Oh. Well, if you and Harry Von Zell both think so, then it must be true.
- Gracie Allen: He's pulled things like this before. For instance, take my birthday - signing a check and telling me to buy anything I want! Naturally, I had to tear it up!
- Blanche Morton: Why?
- Gracie Allen: Why? Well, he signed the check but he didn't fill in the amount, that's why.
- Gracie Allen: Oh, you know, I thought you looked terribly young to know so much, but as long as you know so little, then you look just the right age for it.
- Gracie Allen: It's like I told him, he doesn't look old enough to know very much but, on the other hand, you couldn't possibly know enough to be as old as you look, so you make a perfect pair!
- Mr. Hartford: During the tests at Las Vegas, we scientists learned a great deal about the effects of radioactivity from goats and mice and rabbits...
- Gracie Allen: Oh, isn't it amazing to think those little animals knew more about it than you did?
- Gracie Allen: You know, we had a dog once and he was so smart! He could sit down by himself! And we taught him to bark whenever he wanted to.
- Blanche Morton: [to George] Why you ought to be ashamed of yourself, taking advantage of your neighbors and your friends! Why that's downright dishonest.
- Gracie Allen: Now wait a minute, Blanche. You can't come over here and say a thing like that to George! How would you like it if I came over to your house and said things like that about my husband?
- George Burns: Thank you, dear.
- Gracie Allen: If you can have secrets from me, I can have secrets from you.
- George Burns: Secrets? What secrets have I got?
- Gracie Allen: Oh, don't play so innocent, George. How would you like it if you heard me talking to somebody on the phone, and saying "I've got something but don't tell George?" And after being happily married for 25 years, I wouldn't, but you did.
- George Burns: Whatever that is, I did that today?
- Gracie Allen: Well don't forget, two can play that game as well as I can.
- George Burns: Do you know what you're talking about?
- Gracie Allen: Well, of course I know what I'm talking about. And even if I didn't, it wouldn't be the first time.
- Harry von Zell: I'll just say this to you, Mr. Burns. I'm certainly glad I'm not working for you anymore. Why you're selfish and underhanded. You're not fit to associate with decent people!
- Gracie Allen: Now Harry, I realize you're our friend, but you can't say things like that to George. I don't even like it when my family says it!
- George Burns: Gracie, will you please stop helping me?