- George Burns: Here's one thing parents can't figure out. Why do their children hate school? We parents have loved it ever since our kids were old enough to go to it.
- Harry Morton: My sympathetic nature once led me to become involved with a girl who was not too attractive to the opposite sex and the results were disastrous.
- Blanche Morton: Really? What happened?
- Harry Morton: I married you.
- George Burns: [Gracie discusses each of her aunt's nine husbands] Who was number eight?
- Gracie Allen: A doctor, Uncle Leo. Oh, a fine man and very successful.
- George Burns: Oh, finally picked a good one, huh?
- Gracie Allen: Yes, and they were very happy for several days.
- George Burns: Then what happened?
- Gracie Allen: Well, then he began coming home every night and telling her everything his patients had told him that day, and it made her very nervous and so she left him.
- George Burns: Because his patients talked to him?
- Gracie Allen: He was a tree surgeon.
- George Burns: Um, who came after Uncle Leo?
- Gracie Allen: A couple men in white coats.