- [Mr. Howell, the Professor, and Skipper are dressed as women in an attempt to fool some visiting natives looking for a "white goddess" to throw into their volcano]
- Jonas 'The Skipper' Grumby: [chuckling] Well, I must say, you two are a gruesome twosome!
- Thurston Howell III: You don't make us a thrillsome threesome, I might say.
- Professor Roy Hinkley: You know, I don't think this is going to work.
- Thurston Howell III: Maxine, I don't know about you and Laverne, but I'm getting out of this.
- Jonas 'The Skipper' Grumby: Wait a minute! Where's Gilligan? Gilligan?
- [shouting]
- Jonas 'The Skipper' Grumby: Gilligan!
- Gilligan: [running in to hut] Somebody call... me?
- Gilligan: I'd hate to judge this beauty contest, because nobody'd win!
- [giggles]
- Professor Roy Hinkley: He might be able to pull it off.
- Gilligan: Oh, no. I'm not gonna dress up like a girl!
- Jonas 'The Skipper' Grumby: Oh, yes you are! And that's an order!
- Gilligan: I'm not gonna dress up like a girl, and you can't make me.
- [scene segues to Gilligan in drag]
- Gilligan: You can't make me! You can't make me!