The Golden Girls (TV Series)

Strange Bedfellows (1987)

Bea Arthur: Dorothy Zbornak

Quotes 

• Rose Nylund : [reading the morning paper]  They caught Gil Kessler having an affair.

  Dorothy Zbornak : [assuming it's a joke]  Oh, you're kidding. With whom?

  Rose Nylund : Well, they don't know her name, but look, they hid in the bushes and took this picture of her from behind going into his house.

  Dorothy Zbornak : I don't believe th... wait a minute, that looks like Blanche's red dress.

  Sophia : And those look like Blanche's red shoes.

  Dorothy Zbornak : And aren't they her diamond earrings and gold bracelet?

  Rose Nylund : [outraged]  That little floozie stole Blanche's clothes!

  Dorothy Zbornak : It's like having Agatha Christie right here in our kitchen! Rose, Blanche *is* that little floozie!

  Rose Nylund : You... you mean he...

  Sophia : She's at the fifty.

  Rose Nylund : They...

  Sophia : The forty.

  Rose Nylund : She...

  Sophia : The thirty.

  Rose Nylund : [Blanche walks in]  Blanche, it's *you*!

  Blanche : [mocking]  Oh, you're getting so good at that, Rose, now who's that over there?

• Sophia : [Sophia has reservations about the City Council candidate Dorothy is supporting]  He's a wimp, Dorothy.

  Dorothy Zbornak : Oh, ma. For your information, Gil Kessler is a very bright man, an honest and devoted civic leader... and probably the biggest wimp I've ever known in my life.

  Sophia : That's not all. There's something else I don't like about him.

  Dorothy Zbornak : What?

  Sophia : I don't know. It's a hunch. I can't put my finger on it. But if I could, I would have to wash it.

• Rose Nylund : [a local politician reveals a long-held secret]  I'm still confused about the operation Gil Kessler had. Is the man asleep during it?

  Dorothy Zbornak : [wearily]  I think so, Rose.

  Rose Nylund : And what about the parts they put on. Do they test them first?

  Dorothy Zbornak : [mocking]  Of course, Rose, like windshield wipers.

  Rose Nylund : So they work?

  Dorothy Zbornak : I assume so, yes.

  Rose Nylund : What are they made of?

  Dorothy Zbornak : [exasperated]  Silly Putty, Rose!