- Sophia Petrillo: [octogenarian Sophia greets pre-teen Oliver] Hey, shorty.
- Oliver Webb: Hey, wrinkly.
- Blanche Devereaux: [Roland is going into the hotel office to help Oliver with his homework] Oh, Roland, you don't have to be here. I gave you the night off.
- Roland Wilson: No, I kinda want to stay in for Oliver. It's OK, I don't mind, I'm a workaholic.
- Rose Nylund: [Rose overhears the end of the conversation as Roland is leaving] Oh my God, he's been drinking workahol?
- Blanche Devereaux: Rose, don't you think it's kinda strange that Roland hasn't taken one night off since we've been here?
- Rose Nylund: And I know why. He's lonely. He hasn't been dating, there's no love in his life. I should know. I'm the expert on love.
- Blanche Devereaux: [scoffing] Oh, please! Get real! You've had, what, three men the last 40 years? I had that many between the Kennedy and Oswald assassinations.
- Rose Nylund: Yeah, and how many of that faceless horde say 'I love you'?
- Blanche Devereaux: Honey, if I touch 'em in the right place, I can get 'em to say, 'It's Howdy Doody time'!
- Sophia Petrillo: I think there's a very simple reason Roland doesn't date women.
- Rose Nylund: Why?
- Sophia Petrillo: Because they're not men.
- Blanche Devereaux: Oh, you don't mean...
- Sophia Petrillo: Please! I haven't seen a flame that big since I went to Arlington Cemetery.