The Goodies (TV Series)
Kitten Kong (1971)
Graeme Garden: Graeme Garden
Photos
Quotes
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Bill Oddie : Surely you're not resentful to a little kindness to one of our dumb friends!
Tim Brooke-Taylor : Well the only "dumb friend" I've got is YOU!
Bill Oddie : [offended, sarcastic] Well, thank you very much! After I went and made supper for you, as well...
Tim Brooke-Taylor : Well, we can hardly afford to feed ourselves, and you start giving four-course meals to flaming guinea pigs!
Bill Oddie : Temper, temper!
Tim Brooke-Taylor : Well, since when have we eaten that well?
Bill Oddie : Since when indeed, yes... What did we get last time YOU cooked supper, eh? A bowl of cornflakes.
[Tim sulks]
Bill Oddie : Yes! AND they were burnt.
Tim Brooke-Taylor : Well, better than YOUR soggy lettuce and potato peelings!
Bill Oddie : On the money you give me, you're very lucky to get anything at all, I can tell you! Ooh, I've a good mind to go back to mother...
Tim Brooke-Taylor : Well, go!
Bill Oddie : I shall!
Graeme Garden : [Has had enough] Now LISTEN!
Tim Brooke-Taylor , Bill Oddie : [Perfect unison] And you keep out of this!
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Graeme Garden : [Reassuring Tim about Twinkle] It's not a monster, it's a kitten! Anyway, it's time for his vitamin pills.
[Opens the cage to find it empty]
Graeme Garden : He's gone... someone's taken him!
[suddenly attacks Tim, shrieking at him]
Graeme Garden : You! YOU! You've done something to him, haven't you? You never liked him! What have you done with my pussy?
Tim Brooke-Taylor : [while being shaken violently by Graeme] I haven't touched him! I wouldn't dare go NEAR him!
Bill Oddie : Oh, it wasn't him; it was me.
Graeme Garden : What?
Bill Oddie : It wasn't him. He's all right, I only put him "out".
Graeme Garden : [screams] YOU DID WHAT?
Bill Oddie : You should always put the cat "out" at night. So I... I did.
Graeme Garden : YOU IDIOT! THAT CAT...
[grabs and throws away the Bush Baby, which has attached itself to him again]
Graeme Garden : THAT CAT IS STILL GROWING!
[Runs to get his clothes]
Graeme Garden : Come on! We gotta find him, and catch him before he eats someone he shouldn't!
Tim Brooke-Taylor : [Amused by Graeme's "slip-up"] Ah! You mean some THING he shouldn't.
Graeme Garden : [Voice of Doom] I know what I mean.
Tim Brooke-Taylor , Bill Oddie : Oh heck...