[first lines]
Gary: Hi.
Yvonne: Hi.
Gary: I thought I'd do kidneys for supper.
Yvonne: What? Why?
Gary: Oh, I don't know. I just saw these lamb kidneys in the butcher's windows and a little voice in my head went "yum".
Yvonne: Well, a little voice in my stomach just went "yuck". You know I don't like kidneys.
Gary: I didn't know you don't like kidneys. We've never had kidneys.
Yvonne: Yes, that's why.
Gary: If I knew you didn't like kidneys, would I have bought kidneys?
Yvonne: You know you might unconsciously be punishing me.
Gary: For what?
Yvonne: For making you do the cooking.
Gary: You don't make me do the cooking; I like doing the cooking. It was my suggestion, if you recall, that we share that particular chore.
Yvonne: Perhaps, but subliminally your male ego was feeling threatened, and so you offer me this extraordinarily symbolic meal to say: "Look, you are unmanning me."
Gary: You been sunbathing without a hat again? What do you mean, symbolic?
Yvonne: Well, kidneys look like testicles, right? And you offer them to me on a plate, metaphorically saying: "Here is my manhood. Now are you satisfied?"
Gary: [pause] How about a cheese omelette?