- Fred Mertz: [Fred and Ethel aren't speaking, Fred blames Lucy, and he is eating alone in the living room as Lucy and Ricky knock on the door] Come in.
- Lucy Ricardo: Hello, Fred.
- Fred Mertz: [less than enthusiastic] Oh, it's you.
- Ricky Ricardo: What's that you're eating?
- Fred Mertz: My breakfast.
- Ricky Ricardo: A bottle of beer and a salami sandwich?
- Fred Mertz: Well, it's the only thing I know how to cook. Ethel has locked herself in the bedroom and won't come out.
- Lucy Ricardo: Well, that's why we're here, Fred. I have a plan that'll fix everything.
- Fred Mertz: Please. From now on, your channel doesn't come in on my set.
- Lucy Ricardo: He'll listen to you, Ricky. You tell him I have a wonderful plan that won't cost him a cent.
- Ricky Ricardo: My scatterbrained wife has another half-witted scheme, and if you listen to it, you're out of your mind.
- Lucy Ricardo: Boy, did I suffer in that translation!
- Lucy Ricardo: Oh, Ethel, where have you been?
- Ethel Mertz: Downtown.
- Lucy Ricardo: [tired of Lucy's bragging, Ricky has forbidden Lucy to mention the mink stole he is buying her] Guess what! Ricky's giving me a mmmm... Ohhhh, I'm not allowed to say it... Ricky is giving me something. Something that every woman has always wanted from her husband.
- Ethel Mertz: A divorce?
- Ethel Mertz: Fred, Lucy and Ricky'll be here in a minute.
- Fred Mertz: That's good.
- Ethel Mertz: Well, go change.
- Fred Mertz: Change?
- Ethel Mertz: You don't expect to stay dressed like that, do you?
- Fred Mertz: Well, from the tone of your voice, I guess I don't!