"Just Shoot Me!" Secretary's Day (TV Episode 1997) - Laura San Giacomo as Maya Gallo

Maya Gallo : I once did a report on the dangers of plastic surgery, and do you know what the statistics say?

Nina Van Horn : Yes, that nine out of ten men prefer women with big boobs.

Elliot DiMauro : And the tenth guy preferred the other nine men.
Nina Van Horn : [on her fake breasts] Relax, they're on loan.

Maya Gallo : From who? Jessica Rabbit?
Dennis Finch : Please, I've had enough contact with dominant females.

Maya Gallo : Yes, but unlike the gorilla, I won't be giving you a tongue bath.
Jack Gallo : See what happens when you leave in the middle of a workday?

Dennis Finch : Yeah, the Banana Council offers you three times your salary to be their spokesman.

Maya Gallo : Wow, that's great. Isn't it, dad?

Jack Gallo : Yes, we're all very impressed you fell into the monkey pit.
Nina Van Horn : I know what this is about. You want to have the biggest breasts in the office.

Maya Gallo : Curses! You've caught on to my evil plot to use my bosoms to take over this magazine, and one day, the world!
Maya Gallo : I hoped you're proud of yourself. Dennis came to you with a problem, and do you help him?

Jack Gallo : Yes. I thought he left here very inspired.

Maya Gallo : Oh, Lord, you quoted grandpa.

Laura San Giacomo: Maya Gallo