- Spence Olchin: [to Doug's mother] Excuse me, Mrs. Heffernan; can I use the restroom?
- Joe Heffernan: Oh, no; here we go again.
- Spence Olchin: Wait a minute; first, I didn't know you were home that day, second, Victoria Principal was on the cover of the new 'People' and third, what kind of man owns a hardware store and doesn't put locks on the bathroom door?
- Arthur Spooner: [Enters hardware store] Ah, just the man I wanted to see.
- Owen: Hey, what's up?
- Arthur Spooner: I have something to show you, vis-a-vis our conversation the other day.
- Owen: What?
- Arthur Spooner: Meet the future. The prototype of the "Arthur's" head screwdriver.
- Owen: Oh-oh, yeah.
- Arthur Spooner: I fashioned it from an old typewriter key. You see, the letter "A" on the screwdriver will fit into the corresponding "A" hole in the "Arthur's" screw.
- Owen: Cool.
- Arthur Spooner: So, uh, how many units would be an appropriate first order for an item of this magnitude?
- Owen: I don't know.
- Arthur Spooner: Ballpark.
- Owen: 10,000.
- Arthur Spooner: Really? My heart's beatin' like a rabbit. We'll be in touch.
- Arthur Spooner: [Arthur walks out of the hardware store, raises his left arm and head upward] Ya-ha!
- Janet Heffernan: Mr. O'Boyle, do you have children?
- Supervisor Patrick O'Boyle: Couple of boys. 17 and 2.