- [first lines]
- Nora Batty: What are you doing?
- Alvin: Just testing.
- Nora Batty: I know you're a bit wet, but do you need a drainpipe?
- Alvin: It's a viewscope. Auntie's selling them.
- Nora Batty: What do you want one of them things for?
- Alvin: Well, I didn't go in for one of these; I went in to chose a roll of lino. But lino lacks entertainment appeal. These are more interesting than lino.
- Nora Batty: As long as you don't go staring at me through it.
- Alvin: Just testing. You needn't read anything giddy into it. You're a bit lacking in entertainment appeal yourself. Have you never felt the urge to act on impulse?
- Nora Batty: [Nora pushes the ladder Alvin is standing on so he falls off] Next question.