Leave It to Beaver (TV Series)
Beaver's First Date (1961)
Jerry Mathers: The Beaver
Photos
Quotes
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Theodore 'Beaver' Cleaver : Hey, Wally, when Mom first asked you about being a chaperone you squawked all over the place. How come all of a sudden you changed your mind?
Wallace 'Wally' Cleaver : Awww, 'cause Dad gave me a lecture about family responsibility. And five dollars.
Theodore 'Beaver' Cleaver : [with a hint of sarcasm] Oh. Dad sure knows how to talk to kids, doesn't he.
Theodore 'Beaver' Cleaver : [a short time later] Hey, Wally, you're taking that Julie Foster, aren't you?
Wallace 'Wally' Cleaver : Yeah. Mrs. Thompson called up her mother and got her to be a chaperone, too.
Theodore 'Beaver' Cleaver : Do you think her mother had to pay her five dollars?
Wallace 'Wally' Cleaver : Naah, you don't have to bribe girls to go to dances and parties and stuff. They've got a natural instinct for standin' around lookin' stupid.
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Wallace 'Wally' Cleaver : [Beaver tries to call a girl for a date, but hangs up the phone while dialing] What's the matter now?
Theodore 'Beaver' Cleaver : I just thought: what if her mother answers?
Wallace 'Wally' Cleaver : Oh, it usually pays to be real nice to mothers. If she answers, you should say, um, "Good evening, Mrs. Patterson. I hope I'm not disturbing you, but may I please speak to Betsy?"
Theodore 'Beaver' Cleaver : Okay.
[resumes dialing, then pauses]
Theodore 'Beaver' Cleaver : What if her father answers?
Wallace 'Wally' Cleaver : Oh, uh, when that happens, I usually just hang up.
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Wallace 'Wally' Cleaver : Yeah, I guess Dad might buy you a new suit.
Theodore 'Beaver' Cleaver : Gee, Wally, if I tell Dad I want a new suit, he's gonna ask me what I want it for. And if I had to tell him I liked a girl, I think I'd get sick right in the den.
Wallace 'Wally' Cleaver : Maybe you'd better talk to Mom.
Theodore 'Beaver' Cleaver : I guess moms are better for mushy stuff.
Wallace 'Wally' Cleaver : Sure. She's not so apt to come right out and laugh at ya.
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[last lines]
Theodore 'Beaver' Cleaver : Anyway, I don't think any girl is worth going through all the stuff *I* went through tonight.
Wallace 'Wally' Cleaver : Well, I guess I felt that way when I was your age, too.
Theodore 'Beaver' Cleaver : Ya did? How'd ya get over it?
Wallace 'Wally' Cleaver : Well, ya just have to keep going to these dances and things until ya get used to it. Even now, sometimes I have to sit down and remind myself that I'm having a good time!