- Lou Grant: Why do beach stories take twice as long as stories on the inner city?
- Billie Newman: It's hard to walk through the sand...
- Lieutenant McPhee: I'll tell you one thing...
- [takes a bite of Doreen's apple pie]
- Lieutenant McPhee: ... whoever is living in Charlie Hume's house, isn't with the Los Angeles Police Department.
- Joe Rossi: Boy, I knew it. I told Charlie this whole thing stinks.
- Lieutenant McPhee: You think that stinks? You ought to try the apple pie.
- Lou Grant: This guy Thatcher was pretty convincing.
- Lieutenant McPhee: And pretty thorough. If my wife had kept the house this clean, I never would have divorced her.
- Charlie Hume: Dillon, Collins, whoever you are, what the hell was going on in my house and why did you lie to us?
- Thatcher: I only lied about my name.
- Lou Grant: And about your connection with L.A.P.D.
- Thatcher: You said L.A.P.D., not me.