- Lou Grant: [carrying Mary in the newsroom, after she slipped in the hall and sprained her foot] First we have to get you X-rayed. All we can do around here is get you Xeroxed.
- Rhoda Morgenstern: You're having a lousy streak. I happen to be having a terrific streak. Soon the world will be back to normal again. Tomorrow you will meet a crown head of Europe and marry. I will have a fat attack, eat 300 peanut butter cups and die.
- Ted Baxter: It all started in a 5,000 watt radio station in Fresno California, a 65 dollar paycheck and a crazy dream.
- Rhoda Morgenstern: Eat some candy.
- Mary Richards: Rhoda, chocolate solves nothing.
- Rhoda Morgenstern: No no, cottage cheese solves nothing. Chocolate can do it all.