Bob Uecker: George Owens

Quotes 

• Man : Did you get the mattress and box spring I left on your lawn?

  George Owens : Yeah, we did. Thanks.

  Man : You using it?

  George Owens : No.

  Man : Why not?

  George Owens : Well, for one thing, it smells like someone's been raising goats on it.

• George Owens : [to the unruly crowd at the Good Citizenship Awards]  I'm proud I'm George Owens, unemployed sports writer, and I'll tell you why. Because I got a great family. A family who sticks together through thick and thin. I mean my oldest kid and butler are out slinging chickens. My wife is taking in typing. And my youngest kid, he brings home money too. We're just afraid to ask him where he's getting it.