My Family (TV Series)
First Past the Post (2004)
Zoë Wanamaker: Susan Harper
Quotes
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Susan Harper : How come we're talking about what you want to talk about and not what I want to talk about?
Ben Harper : Well, you want to talk about Roger.
Susan Harper : No, I don't.
Ben Harper : Neither do I. I don't want to talk about anything.
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Susan Harper : Have you noticed the streets around here? They're a disgrace. There's litter. graffiti, abandoned furniture, dog mess...
Ben Harper : Well, it's an up-and-coming area.
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Ben Harper : [On hearing Susan is running for office] What? You're not serious, are you?
Susan Harper : You bet your sweet bippy I'm serious.
Ben Harper : Well, how come this is the first time I heard anything about it?
Susan Harper : I was saving it for your full attention.
Ben Harper : You never have my full attention.
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Susan Harper : You remember our local councillor?
Ben Harper : Er... no?
Susan Harper : The grey haired man who looked like a doctor.
Ben Harper : Nnnnnno?
Susan Harper : With the funny eye?
Ben Harper : No.
Susan Harper : Well, he's died.
Ben Harper : No - and I never told him I loved him.
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Susan Harper : I'm going to transcend petty party politics. I'm standing as an independent, like, er... what's his name? Who's the man in the white suit?
Ben Harper : Alec Guinness?
Susan Harper : No.
Michael Harper : Barry Manilow?
Susan Harper : No.
Abi Harper : Ricardo Montalban?
Susan Harper : Thank you! Martin Bell!
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Susan Harper : I'm going to be a single-issue candidate: street hygiene.
Ben Harper : Oh, street? That'll pull them in! Whoa! Vote for Susan Harper - your dog poo candidate! Michael, your own mother is standing on dog crap!
Michael Harper : It'll be all over the newspapers!
Ben Harper : It's a smear campaign!
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Ben Harper : I'm trying to do a crossword.
Susan Harper : I'm trying to change the world.
Ben Harper : Mmm. And I know who's going to do the least damage.
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Susan Harper : [about Michael's pet tarantula] Is she poisonous?
Michael Harper : Well, I wouldn't put it that way.
Susan Harper : Well, what way would you put it?
Michael Harper : The actual term is 'venomous'.
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Susan Harper : I can't believe you're doing the same crossword.
Ben Harper : Look, A: these compilers are very clever, and B: I am doing a different crossword.
Susan Harper : Only because you took so long doing last week's.
Ben Harper : I took 20 minutes.
Susan Harper : Spread over 14 days.